Whenever you have visited one of these big box stores (Lowes, WalMart, etc.), you have seen scooters going about 1/2 mile per hour down the aisles. They are driven (usually) by the elderly. Well, today I had the honor of driving one of those scooters.

There wasn't too much carnage in my wake. You know, merchandise strewn here and there and there weren't too many people laid out from being hit (Imagine hearing over the PA system, "Ambulance to Aisle 4!") by one of these counfounded things.

There was a time in the not too distant past where it was my wife that was in these scooters knocking over merchandise (sometimes purposefully) because it was packed too tightly to allow someone with disabilities easy access. Imagine pulling clothing behind you similar to having toilet tissue stuck to your shoe and leaving the rest room.

I also learned that these things can be somewhat tricky to drive. I turned right. The damn thing went straight. "Officer, the scooter had a mind of its own. I didn't mean to run over the elderly gentlemen!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Translation: "Oh, the humanity!!!!!

I also developed a new appreciation for these sometimes contrary things. They allowed me to negotiate the same two stores I had last Saturday without having a major fatigue attack.

I am not sure I can get used to having my wife (You know, the one with the cane.) walk beside me driving the cart. It just sounds wrong if you know what I mean.

I will be out of town for the next few days.

More later on.

Charles Ramsey