It doesn't seem possible that today is the tenth day already in 2009. I finally have done something that I set out to do for the New Year. I have made amends to my body and asked for forgiveness. That probably seems silly to some who might read this entry, but to me it was long overdue.

I sat down and truly thought about what my body has been through with me, it's roommate.

It was very good to me as a youngster except for the times I had Mono, like in the first grade and the time I got stuck in a huge bee hive while walking home from school and I went the short cut and ran into a bunch of bee hives, my friend, Chris, and I were in some kind of pain. Our parents weren't real happy with either one of us. Growing up, my body was still good to me. I was on the swim team and won most of my races that I entered, I taught swimming and diving, was a Life Guard, enjoyed those fun filled summer days. Enjoyed riding my bike .... enjoyed life .... never thought about what getting older meant. I danced in six 52 hour dance marathons while raising money for cancer and muscular dystrophy in the seventies.

"Dance For Those Who Can't and Dancers Against Cancer".... I had a very interesting young adult life. Things didn't get tough until I started having problems which I wouldn't know what was going on until later on in life, The diagnosis was Myasthenia Gravis. Then I ended up with A quad bypass and became a Brain Stem Stroke Survivor.

None of which was planned for my life, but, I had to pick up the pieces and move forward.

I needed to say I was sorry to my body.

My Body went to battle for me and took these blows from the enemy, Myasthenia Gravis, and Brain Stem Stroke and TIA's. I need to embrace my body and thank her for saving me and fighting for life, a breath, to save me. She deserves so much more than what I have given her. I respect her and for the rest of my days that I have on this earth I promise to embrace her and love her and become best friends with her. I didn't realize I didn't have an ongoing relationship with her. I realize I need to have an open mind, spirit and body connection. I am taking this new thinking a second at a time. I have done so much thinking since I have been so sick and it makes sense to me. My body has gone to war on my behalf and has fought with all she has. While I laid in a coma and on life support she was giving it all she had. It might be five years in the making, but, it has started. Making amends has been very healing for me. I am starting to feel better about me, myself and I. I am not being so hard on myself. I truly feel 2009 is going to be a good year for me. I Believe In Miracles and I will SOAR. SOAR to good health, happiness, peace. One day at a time. Be Blessed, Hugs, Jan