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A Decision


briank

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Hi folks.

 

 

something has changed. some fog has lifted. i feel better. thoughts seem more clear. i don't feel as afraid. i can smile and laugh some again.

 

and it has come with a decision of sorts.

 

my 3 small strokes occurred on November 4, 2008. i know that can not be changed, and i can never again be a “non-stroke-survivor.”

 

what i have decided, however, is that i no longer want to consider myself a “STROKE-SURVIVOR.”

 

post-stroke, that is what i naturally considered myself to be.

 

and i got stuck there.

 

and i stayed there.

 

and i wallowed there.

 

and i obsessed there.

 

and “STROKE-SURVIVOR” became my identity. BRIAN took on less meaning, and STROKE-SURVIVOR took on more meaning.

 

and i got lost in that place.

 

no more..............that is what i have decided.

 

no more.

 

i will use the term, “stroke survivor”.....but i will no longer let it be my only sense of identity.

 

i will not allow it to be all that i am.

 

i am a stroke survivor it is true. doesn't stop there though.

 

my perspective is back to what it should be.

 

I AM BRIAN.

 

AND I HAPPENED TO HAVE SURVIVED STROKE.

 

BUT BRIAN IS WHO I AM.

 

simple decision.....huge difference for me.

 

 

(took me almost two years to see this in proper persepective.)

 

and i am glad you all are here.

 

:bbq: BURGERS ARE DONE!.......WHO WANTS ONE???!!! :big_grin:

 

 

 

5 Comments


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Brian, this is called moving forward or moving on. A wise person learns from what has happened but does't make it the whole focus of life.

 

Good for you. :You-Rock:

 

Sue.

 

Chicken for me thanks.

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Brian, you are moving on with life. I am Stephanie and like to be known as Logan's "G." I am a two-time survivor of both stroke and breast cancer but that doesn't defne who I really am. Sure, my life changed but I choose to live in the present I am happy for you, my friend, that you are refocusing and moving on.

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Love your Blog, Brian!! It hasn't been a year yet for me but I'm slowly trying to move forward & not dwell on my situation. Biggest 'monkey on my shoulder' if you will is the WHY? But I'm less obsessed about it now.. LOL.. & slowly learning to accept that I may never know...

 

You are an inspiration & I'm happy for you too! :-)

 

~Blessings,

Danielle

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Brian that really got me thinking Is Stroke Survivor my Identity? I cannot answer that with a resounding No! I think maybe if I had not had so many strokes to survive or so nearly fatal my need to so strongly indentify with the survivor mentality. You know what though you are so Right I am Karen Thanks for this Blog you really got me examining some stuff.....Thanks friend!! Hugs Karen

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