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I was just wondering if anyone choses to find another Doctor if he/she has poor bedside manner even tho he/she is a great doctor. I started seeing another doc. and he speaks very quickly, interrupts me and overall isn't at all interested in what I have to say. However, he is very intelligent. So, opinions?

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Justine: both Bruce and I have a problem with his Neuro. He also has a side-line of supplements he promotes. Personally I do not think he likes Stroke patients. He focuses on his own agenda and never seems to allow time for our questions. This past week, I took a list out and he says "Oh, a list?" I let him get through his stuff and when he stood up to dismiss us, I just said this will only take a few minutes Doctor. He was annoyed but I got what I needed. I need this specialist and when we were assigned to him in the hospital, I was assured he was the best and was particularly good with younger stroke victims. Personally I don't see it and Bruce's PCP will do anything for us, so I keep the Neuro appointments and Bruce's does his tests and then we move on. I am hoping next visit he puts us off for a year appointment instead of six months. You might take someone with you next visit and have thaat person remind Doctor that you are a stroke survivor and may need a bit of time to process information and formulate questions. Just a thought. Good luck, Debbie

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Hi Justin,

 

I tend to agree with Lenny. Your Dr should listen to you and respect you. If I were you I would change Doctor's. Let us know how it goes for you.

 

 

 

Bruce Schwentker

 

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If the Neuro does not act like he cares then loose him. His IQ cannot be that high if he cannot treat his patients with respect and some kindness. After all he is a doctor and he probably had to take an oath, or did he miss that part. I had seen another neuro actually for a second opinion on treatment. Was supposed to be one of the "best".This guy was completly wrapped up in himself. It was a teaching hospital and he was supposed to be on top of his game. Treated me like I was'nt even there. Dianosed me with MS right on the spot. Told me to go off the blood thinners and he would see me in three months. Kinda really did'nt think i even should be taking the asprin. But he said ok. Pretty smart guy. (Oh.... I did not go back) It got me another MRI and here it is three years later, no MS but could'nt get rid of the stroke deficiets.

 

Terry

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:doctor: Your body - your choice , simple as that!!

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Go with your gut.

 

case in point I travel 3 hours ( each way) once a week and pay out of pocket to see one doctore because He has wonderful bedside mannor.

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my opinion on this, is to find a different dr. who listens and takes his time with you. when you schedule the appointment, they usually ask you what its for, like a follow up or a particular problem, which they should schedule the appropriate time for you. if not ask for it after all you are paying this person. especially if he has a poor bedside manner. i would move on and find another a good relationship with your dr, is very important. i have been very fortunate with mine. he is head of the neuro stroke center and takes his time with each patient, i appreciate his willingness to take his time if we need it. of coarse if dr's are limited in your area, you might be stuck with this one, i would even drive alittle further if you would be happier with them. good luck on whatever you decide to do.

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For me it depends on the kind of doctor. I have never had a surgeon who had a decent bedside manner-- but I'll pick the guy who does the best job in surgery over the one who listens. For a GP - i need someone who listens and cares. For a neurologist, it would depend on why you are seeing him and what other doctors are available. My Mom's neurologist was a jerk (to be plain) but he ordered whatever her physiatrist (a lovely, lovely man) recommended, and basically just kept on eye on my Mom's test results. He was a very smart guy who knew when she was in danger and what to do in those circumstances so we stayed with him, and got the explanations and emotional support from the GP and physiatrist.

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Doctors only know so much. This book will give you pause on trusting what your doctor says. Hippocrates' shadow : secrets from the house of medicine / David H. Newman. Good for realizing that doctors do not know everything. I'm afraid you'll have to keep asking questions even though he doesn't like it. The 'A list' comment to me would be a reason to report him to the hostpital/clinic for poor bedside manner. I basically fired all my doctors because they knew so little and were completely out-of-date. They work for us so we have the right to question them.

Dean

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hello well in my opinion if a doctor is not willing to talk about it or to listen to what you have that is trobling you weather he is mart or not i think that it is time to move on and find a doctor who will try to listen to you and have very good bedside manner . i hope that you will find a doctor that is willing to listen to you

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thanks for all the imput. I am going back to this doc. one more time. Mostly bc he is the only one I can get into before October. He is going to do my sleep study. My neurologist is amazing. I love her. So, I always check with her before I take any new meds etc.

I am still having vicious migraines/TIA's which I have had since before my stroke.

The WORST doc. I had was a neurologist who, after my stroke but before I had KNEW I had a stroke, told me he thought what needed was to see a therapst due to my cognitive issues (speech, loss of words, confusion). I really thought I was losing my mind. He kept telling me that he was disappointed in me. THEN when I got a phone call to immediately go to his office, he said "well, I guess you had a stroke". No apology, nothing...Haven't seen him since.

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A nurse's opinion on neuro doctors........

 

As one colleague put it, neuro doctors are usually the best and brightest in their class (Neuro is one of the most difficult subjects). They are mostly cerebral in nature, and therefore may be blunt or appear unemotional. A medical student who loved talking and comforting patients could have gone into oncology, or family medicine, or psychology. Neurosurgeons become neurosurgeons because they want to fix things... and fix it fast. And they chose to fix the most complicated organ of all.

 

That said, really gentle / kind / sensitive neurosurgeons are rare and few. But they do exist. However it happens, ask questions. It's always their job to answer them

 

If a loved one needed urgent brain surgery or was critical, I'd get the best neurosurgeon regardless of bedside manner. Skill and expertise in treatment do make a world of difference during this critical period. After the patient is stable, then I'd be more willing to consider other options - perhaps someone who listens more and has better bedside manners. Rehab, after all, is a totally different ballgame.

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Like Ethyl17 I also take a list of questions with me when I see my neurologist. Party because I tend to forget everything I intended to ask the moment I walk in the door of the doctors office and partly because they can be rushed and abrupt. Nothing is more frustrating then having been dismissed from the doctors office without having any of your concerns addressed.

 

If it goes beyond this to the point where you are feeling intimidated by you doctor, you need to either address the issue with the doctor (who will probably immediately feel bad and take steps to correct the behavior) or change doctors. Keep in mind that you are the boss in this relationship.

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A nurse's opinion on neuro doctors........

 

As one colleague put it, neuro doctors are usually the best and brightest in their class (Neuro is one of the most difficult subjects). They are mostly cerebral in nature, and therefore may be blunt or appear unemotional. A medical student who loved talking and comforting patients could have gone into oncology, or family medicine, or psychology. Neurosurgeons become neurosurgeons because they want to fix things... and fix it fast. And they chose to fix the most complicated organ of all.

 

That said, really gentle / kind / sensitive neurosurgeons are rare and few. But they do exist. However it happens, ask questions. It's always their job to answer them

 

If a loved one needed urgent brain surgery or was critical, I'd get the best neurosurgeon regardless of bedside manner. Skill and expertise in treatment do make a world of difference during this critical period. After the patient is stable, then I'd be more willing to consider other options - perhaps someone who listens more and has better bedside manners. Rehab, after all, is a totally different ballgame.

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Some of my family have been in the medical profession and believe that the bigger the #%$%hole that you are, the better the doctor that you are. They did not develop that kind of confidence overnight and have worked their way to that level. I don't care what kind of bed side manners a doctor with me as long as he is good at what he does.

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There are a lot of good doctors around, and a great many of the good ones have a fine bedside manner. Hospitals and insurance companies don't like rude, and basically nasty doctors. There was a PBS research program that I watched one time that dealt with this issue and the doctors that were sued the most were of the group that most often had a curt and dismissing attitude to patients and patients families. It kinda proves that if you can, try and be nice, what's the big deal.

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I was just wondering if anyone choses to find another Doctor if he/she has poor bedside manner even tho he/she is a great doctor. I started seeing another doc. and he speaks very quickly, interrupts me and overall isn't at all interested in what I have to say. However, he is very intelligent. So, opinions?

i have to agree with most other replies here, tell him how you feel, he should know to tell you in small digestable pieces of information and of course he should listen, find another one for your own sake he may be smart but if hes not listening then hes not that smart :silly: , Jade

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thanks for all the imput. I am going back to this doc. one more time. Mostly bc he is the only one I can get into before October. He is going to do my sleep study. My neurologist is amazing. I love her. So, I always check with her before I take any new meds etc.

I am still having vicious migraines/TIA's which I have had since before my stroke.

The WORST doc. I had was a neurologist who, after my stroke but before I had KNEW I had a stroke, told me he thought what needed was to see a therapst due to my cognitive issues (speech, loss of words, confusion). I really thought I was losing my mind. He kept telling me that he was disappointed in me. THEN when I got a phone call to immediately go to his office, he said "well, I guess you had a stroke". No apology, nothing...Haven't seen him since.

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amazed he graduated. i have also left doctors who didn't listen to me. how can they help if they're not listening to our problem? i actually lucked out and had a neurologist who was encouraging and would praise my determination to improve. unfortunately for me he left and went to the v.a. i told him that i was sorry to see him go but glad that our veterans were getting such a caring dr. they certainly need encouragement and someone who listens and cares. they're out there- the good ones i wish you all the best. we are here to listen but keep checking for a caring one. we've been through too much to settle now.

mlp

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i'd want Dr.House :o

 

 

Unfortunately, House practices fantasy/TV medicine, and I don't live in that world :(

 

About a month after my stroke (maybe two?), I happened to see an episode where the patient developed sudden partial paralysis due to an ischemic blockage. They just ran a miniature plumber's snake up his carotid into the brain, grabbed the clot and pulled it free. The brain cells that had been without oxygen leapt back to life and the paralysis vanished!

 

Maybe what I really want is my doctor, but with House's writers? :)

 

David

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well justine in my opinion even though the doctor may be very good and very itelligent if the doctorwon"t listen to what you are feeling or your complaints anout what you are going through than i would not think that your doctor cares about what you are feeling and i would get rid of the doctor as quickly as possible,

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I was just wondering if anyone choses to find another Doctor if he/she has poor bedside manner even tho he/she is a great doctor. I started seeing another doc. and he speaks very quickly, interrupts me and overall isn't at all interested in what I have to say. However, he is very intelligent. So, opinions?

As as caregiver, I have the same problem. I have chosen to go with the Doctor who seems to care the most about my husband. We have an appointment this week with yet, another, doctor who does not even know my husband's name and I plan to tell him that---I have nothing to lose. I wil then continue my search for someone who cares.

 

Good luck and keep up the struggle! The results are worth it!

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Guest Roaddog

I've got a WHOPPER for y'all... MY Neuro told me, in my Wife's presence, that I'd "done well to get this far" and not to expect a lot more. Now how's THAT for a bedside manner? Or for relating to the Patient?

 

Y' could've knocked me over w/a feather!

 

RD

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