well====Debbie my dear- you will hit your stride again - I promise....... but this stroke road is a very long road with a many twists in it... You are a fearless leader---with many followers...... this is not meant to make you feel over burdened -- but to remind you of the strong, (albeit tiny in stature) woman you are!!! Buck up little camper and laugh ( I'm pretty original with my buck up little camper -not-) .......dan is doing better this week SOOO that means your gonna have a off week with Bruce- sorry... life of the stroke caregivers....and you are doing the impossible caring for a very "affected" husband and working... I was not able to balance it and honest to goodness you are doing fabulous.... tomorrow ( today) will be a better day........nancyl

Debbie,

You need to take it easy on the estim bike. Especially if it is painful for you. You need to get into the pool with Bruce. It will be easier on you and it will make you feel good. I advocate the pool. Especially in the summer.

It would be nice if the caregivers could take Bruce out once in awhile. William also doesn't like to go out much with the caregiver. He goes to church and bible studies with them...but not much else.

I like you run around for a few hours in the morning doing errends. He enjoys sitting in the car while I run in and out of stores.

Bruce is doing well. He help with the bills and paperwork. William does not even think of that. but, he didn't pre-stroke either. That was my relm.

William does not make choices about his life. The major decisions are should I go to the recliner to the bed? Sometimes , I insist that he decide where we go out to eat. He is good about choosing his own food at a rewstaurant. But, at home. i don't even ask. I just give him food to eat. Whatever I want to make.

William's usual response "What are we doing?" or "I am confused". At least he goes with whatever I have planned without too much of a fight.

Tell , Bruce, that I am impressed with the estim bike. He does so well and I really want to keep hearing about his progress.

Debbie, you are doing so well. I missed Tues. chat because my co-worker called in sick and i worked her shift. William was so angry. He said that I should not help her out. But, she was not feeling good...and my caregiver could stay ....But, william really detested that extra 8 hour shift.

Chat with you next week.

Ruth

I agree, that you will be able to come up with a balance in time. As Asha says now it is time to go with the flow, so fit in what you can, overlook what you do not have to do, find small jobs to fill in the down times. I found with Ray that his not wanting to go out was my chance to do something on the long list I had of jobs that needed doing around the house. If not this job, then that, or that, or that, there always will be plenty of choices. It's always pleasing to cross something off the " to do" list.

I don't see Bruce's attitude changing in the near future, but maybe when the heat and humidity is gone and the cooler weather comes he will have more energy. It's a pity that period is so brief. Make the most of it.

Sue.

You are doing well with working plus taking care of Bruce. Things are not perfect at times but that is the way it is. I too wish Larry would take more initiative in things. I usually have to ask him more than twice to get up in the a.m. Look how Bruce does so well in getting up and doing things in the a.m. I don't know how you and others work and take care of all there is to do at home with a stroke survivor. I couldn't do it but sometimes I wish I had a part time job just to have a diversion. It takes a lot of energy now which I sure don't have.

Take it easy on yourself. You are doing well and so is Bruce.

Julie

Debbie, I suppose it's a good thing you got medical training experience and gaining care giver experience came pretty easy for you in knowing what need to be done and when, how much and so on! My wife had no idea what to do in my case but learned her own routine that worked for me! Anything besides banking procedures she was totally lost in caring for another individual especially a husband paralysed on one side and using a WC!!

So you and others here are the best care givers around and we give our thanks as survivors to each one of you! It's a full time job you didn't ask for but got anyway and it can get over bearing at any time! Plus the rolls can change too with the number of strokes suffered by so many people at all ages these days!