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Dans Awake... But not happy to still be here--- update he is happier


nancyl

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So my Dan is awake but not all that happy according to the nurses still very stoic and withdrawn and not really communicating.... this according to the nurses..... I am sitil not gonna rush over there although i want to..... very much but at this point the general concences is... this began with the bump up in meds, prompted the behavior... the not eating/drinking amplified the meds... made more behavior issues....perpetuated the problem( all the while i am making it worse with honey at least take your meds) then he decided to shut down and reboot as debbie says ( good description) and during that shut down i guess his wish was granted to really leave... so in the coma he was gone for a while... but he is back...( really we think the lamicatal like the coumadin got so high it made him comatose) so now with the hyderation this stuff is finally clearing his system and he is awake.... and anyones guess as to how this is gonna go??? once his INR gets to a normal range than we can do the surgery to place the tube to prevent this particular senerio from playing out again... although given all the brain damage fro the stroke.... who knows... anyhow --- whats the saying it is what it is >>>

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All you can do is let him know how much he is loved. I have talked till i am blue in the face to a friend that is going through the" just wanting to die rather than be a burden on their husband" but she just won't listen to how lost he would be without her. I have realized that nothing i do or say can change her mind, it has to come from within her. It is especially hard when they are like Dan and stroke has stolen their thinking process, we don't know if this is truely his feelings or just another thing Stroke has stolen. Stay strong and know that i am here for you in thoughts and prayers!!

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It's almost impossible to talk someone out of being suicidal; if they could only get his meds right it might be a step in the right direction though.

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Nancy:

 

 

Its so hard if the survivor does not see value in living. I am sure medical treatments given this time might save his life this time, but some thing he needs to find in life worth fighting for. Maybe reading him good spiritual books & inspiring books of other survivors who fought back & found joy in living again might be key if he can still understand it. Praying for you both.

 

Asha

 

A

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Nancy.

This is harder on you than I can even imagine. I do not even know what you should do. I will pray for you and Dan.

Ruth

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dan is doing better as the day has went on... the surgeon spent a lot of physical time on him and with him... explaining the best he could to dan what and why things happened.. and his responsibility.... talk about bedside manner... i am so glad we stayed here, in fargo he would probably get mrsa or the like.... here we got something more valuable compassion.. and a honest i give a crap..not a hurry up and move it.. but dan will need to stay till tuesday, which is when we project his inr will be at a operable level...he is eating now so the meds should metabalize faster now.... only at a six now down from the 6.99 but the doc said once it can get food going it could metabalize quickly.. but one of the great unknowns... every one thanks for your support -- i always came here first even before calling family.... strange, not looking necessarily for answers but for the understanding only stroke "families" understand....nancyl

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Nancy,

You simply can't get in his skin, or know what's going on in his head at this point.

Those of us who woke to find that our lives would never be the same can often understand how easy it is to lose hope and feel that giving up would be so much easier. Please don't ever look on this as a failure of any sort on your part.

There is nothing even the most devoted care giver can do until the survivor is ready to accept what has happened and imagine a future life.

Know that you have the most powerful good wishes coming from this gang.

 

Dorothy

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