Things have been a bit rugged around here lately and I feel so exhausted. I seem to need a nap every day which is very unusual for me. I can't decide if it's the new med for depression or if depression itself is to blame. I actually do not feel depressed. I feel exhausted and weary. I was a lot more irritable with Lauren, which is why I went on the antidepressant to begin with. That part has really been helped by the medication. I talked to my doctor about the tiredness and she said it isn't a common reaction to this particular med but it could be that. She recommended I break the pill in two and see if a half dose would still help but ease the sleepiness. I haven't tried that yet but will need to, I think.
Last month I had a week-long visit from a friend who lives in CA. I don't see her face-to-face very often. In spite of the fact that she was quite busy with a conference she was attending, we managed to get some quality visiting in and it did make things brighter that week. It is so good to have conversations about things other than stroke and the difficulties of managing them. We had those conversations as well but much of our time was about other things we have in common. A brief taste of the life I used to have.
We've had some house problems lately that caused a slight emergency. Water heater started streaming water through a rusted out spot so needed immediate replacement. Discovered water in the basement completely unrelated to that but very new. We had boxes down there that got the bottoms soaked so I needed to go through all that and discard, purge, and reorganize. Mold was already taking hold. I had to put Lauren back in respite care for a bit so I could concentrate on getting things cleaned out. With some valuable help from family I got a lot done in a few days time and a number of things out of the house for good. What a blessing!
Unfortunately, that respite time back in the nursing home has taken a serious toll on Lauren's strength. They pretty much let him stay in bed as much as he wanted so he spent many more hours lying down than he does here at home. They help him with everything instead of making him do for himself as much as he can. He came back to me completely debilitated. He has previously bounced back from that fairly soon after our routines get back in place but not so this time. He is weak and "foggy" and has lost a lot of ground. Over a week home and he's not better at all. I really don't know what is going on. He just seems out of it. Complains of back pain a lot but says nothing happened there at the nursing home to cause it. His rehab doctor has ordered more PT so we'll see if that helps get him back on his feet. If not, I think we are seeing another decline setting in. I'm not sure we'll get it back. I'm concerned but feel so helpless and hopeless about it all right now. Tired. I'm tired. ~~Donna