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Yep! It's time I wrote again...


Grannyjudymac72

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Well hello there dear friends. It's been a long time since I sat down here to write. I received two emails today telling me Happy Anniversary. A year ago I signed up here and was pretty faithful in reading and writing. But then I got all caught up in life and recovery. It's been a long year!! Some highs, lots of lows, but life it good. As you see we both survived this past year. I have learned many a thing in regards to life and learning. I became the man of the house (a shock) at how much our husbands do that we take for granted. Good grief, just the little things that I have had to take over that I had no idea was so physically intensive and time consuming. I have always taken care of the home, the cooking, the bill paying and when Ray needed an extra hand outside I was willing to give him a hand, as it was only for a small amount of my time and energy!! But boy has that changed. I won't even go into detail about the man things I have learned how to do around here. Out in the barns and shops and gardens have become almost tolerable for me now. When I first had to go out into the shops and find things and move things and maneuver him around so he wouldn't fall I was very uneasy physically out there. Oh boy yes do I get tired and wish magically there was a man person who could come out there and help me. But that hasn't happened too much yet, so I just take it one day at a time. One of the main things I have learned is to give a lot of it to God!! And most of all I have learned to allow Ray to heal or improve at HIS own pace, not mine. If he wants to rest instead of exercise I let him. That was a big step for me.

I am learning to take one day at a time now and if it's a good day then "yeah". If its a bad day, then it's just another bad day. The main thing is that Ray is alive and I love him so much I will continue to take one day at a time and be his soul mate!! And to continue to pray for his recovery.

I have babysat three of my wild and woolly grandchildren a lot this summer and they do tire me out. It seems as though they are hungry every hour!! Hahahaha. But Ray gets such pleasure out of them being here that that's worth the tired I get. They bring him Joy! And a man recovering from a Stroke has very little joy.

We had to take the summer off of physical and occupational therapy due to a cap in Medicare, but hopefully in a month or two we can start again. That will be a big help.

So my friend I say "hello" again and know that I am doing okay. One day at a time, one step at a time (whether it be one step forward, or one step backward) its still one step at a time!

Hugs, Judy

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Hi Judy, thanks for posting a update.  Most of what you said is what I would have said in the first couple of years.  Why indeed do all of those chores suddenly become ours?  Why do we feel as if "someone" should be there doing it in our place.  Like you I took energy from my achievements, the first time I got the car repaired, when I put back up some of the fence that had fallen down, when I paid for my lawn to be mowed where before Ray had done it.

 

I wonder if those closest to us realise the effort we put into just keeping up the fabric of the place?  I hope you get some help from your family when you need it because often those closest to us do not realise the strain we are under. I loved having the grandkids but oh boy! I do remember how tired I was at the end of the day.  Now mine are scattered and I hardly see them. Welcome back, stay around a while.

 

Sue.

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Judy - thank you so much for the update. Glad to hear you and Ray are settling in, getting into routine. My Bruce is just back to his 2015 Medicare PT allowance and yes, makes such a difference.

 

Your summer has been good - time with the grandkids and the sorting out. And the new chores - isn't it amazing that we still have the capacity to learn something new? Whether or not we want to - LOL.

 

Best to all of you. Debbie

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Judy :

 

Thanks for updating us. you sound so much better this time. I guess acceptance stage is best place to be in when we instead of resisting  life go with flow and start appreciating  day as it comes along.without expectations. I am glad you & Ray got grandkids near by to enjoy them

 

hope to hear from you soon.

 

Asha

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