Hey there, I should have remembered yesterday, if I can relearn the walking and talking bit, handling 'my step-MIL' can be done.

I just stayed straight(no wine thank you, coke please, (stayin sharp-caffienne, wine makes me sleepy, save for home), kept my mouth shut on certain things, and never challenged her with some remarks.

22 years ago I started off with this family(am nuts about the rest of the family -love my sibs in laws BTW) with a clear mind-no judgements. My FIL remarked to my (not really for real MIL- you'll see where this came from)-"How does it feel to have a daughter in law" to which she(I was the newest bride) the brand new wife,(my husband's mom died of brain cancer ) remarked "welllll its not really for real because your son is not my son", so thats where it all began and has gone on, watching her her way with my FIL while telling untruths and putting her spin on us "real kids".

I feel equally sorry for my DH's place in all this as the sole child (out of 5!)who has lasted(20 years and counting) in the family business as she has driven off others (including myself(after she asked me to work there!), SILs, (step daughters and DIL's, even one of her own daughters) .

As if having a stroke is not bad enough for your confidence, her actions in your head, would be enough to keep a shrink busy for years. my FIL is the sweetest man (self made truly starting as an orphan to small business entrapenuer) but she has her way to spin things to her benefit by making it look like its for his benefit. But he takes the path of least resistance....when it comes to her

Out of respect for dad, we say nothing but watch with enduring patience( we've had practice!).... She may love him but finds all of us a bother

We had been invited to a barbeque of one of our salesman who he's watched our kids as they grow and we've seen his kids turn him and wife into grandparents, truly a neat thing.

So I hope we get to endure this more normal relationship for years to come, that part was so very nice, we could have had a really wonderful time if.....

Now I have months of "fresh material" to recover from. Actually, given my blood pressure(which is normally good,love to see it around her), I'm lucky she decided "I was no longer needed" , given what happened to me with stroke(she has a tendency to treat family members as much more dispensible than our real employees) and I'd rather be raising my kids and garden than be stuck in a office with her.been there done that..And my FIL is still the hoot, after she had walked back into the house and he was walking in for another beer he and said "love ya", he's not blind! I think he knows we endure with and for him...Before all of this I had come from a nice normal loving family, then my came Dynasty/falcon crest mini series family I married into.

My mistake, I truly thought my soon to be husband was joking when he said "it can get insane sometimes" its never boring........