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being in love



what does being in love FEEL like? i once thought i knew, but realize now that i do not. sad.gif



i know what LOVE feels like, but what about being IN it? is there a difference? i really dunno. uhm.gif does it mean he's all you think about? or is that lust?. how does a person really know? does it mean you are willing to make sacrifices?. does it mean you are friends before anything else? does it mean that you will do anything FOR that person? is it an un named feeling in your heart that when you have it you just KNOW? head_hurts.gif



my heart has been numb for SO long, i can't feel much. when my body and head got numb too, i was REALLY numb. my mind only recently woke up and now i have this gnawing yearning in my heart, that i will die before i will ever know what being in love FEELS like. sad.gif maybe some people just don't GET to know. i can THINK being in love, i can SEE being in love, i can READ about being in love, i can DO ABOUT ANYTHING about being in love except FEEL it. ohmy.gif


do you have to WANT it?. maybe i don't. maybe i am too old, tired, and stone hearted to know what it felt like if it raised its head to my face and BIT me. yikes.gif maybe i will not think about it anymore. maybe i'll forget it and and tune into other things. hey.... uhm.gif





ya know, like that baseball movie......"field of dreams".












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OK Kim,

I'll attempt to answer this. Being in love! That is the only word that comes to mind. Being in love is completely different then loving someone. Being in love, you feel it in your entire body. Well I do. I feel like my feet aren't touching the floor. I go around singing. It's without the slightest doubt that I want to be with someone flaws and all.

Being in love gives you that confident insulated "safe" feeling. Being in love with someone also means that you are more accepting of character flaws. Usually those flaws can't withstand a normal perusal of what someone is really like, when their eyes are clouded by rose colored glasses.

I know someone who had a habit of falling in love with a person quickly. Were they really in love or they just convinced themselves they were. I think they were in love with the IDEA of being in love.

I can say I am in love, I know how I feel and it is a feeling of such positive vibes that I can understand someone wanting this feeling all the time. Who needs illegal drugs or alchohol or orgasms when you can be in love????

I'll stop gushing now, it is euphoric peace.


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Kim, I may be wrong, but your inability to 'feel in love' probably has to do with the defense mechanisms you have put up to protect yourself because of past bad/hard lessons learned.

When your kitty scratches you and you scold her/him, do you keep that stern attitude forever after? No, you let the warm furriness and her purr to melt your heart and feel love again. Maybe that's a bad example, but hopefully you get the idea. flowers.gifpash.gif

Don't harden your heart to never feel love again, you will only hurt yourself...not the person who hurt you .

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" Love means never having to say you're sorry" biggrin2.gif


Kim you're one for the movies...

Couldn't resist injecting a little leviity here.. bouncesmile.gif


Cheers Tom


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Here's one from an old hopeless romantic.


I used to fall in love hard and fast and it usually ended up bad. I came up with a test to tell if it was love or me being in love with love. (BTW, 2 people in my life passed this test. One was my second fiance (long story) and the 2nd was Kathy).


Go out looking for some eye candy. When you find that hunka human flesh pay attention to what your mind is doing. If it's having fantasies of what you would do to that person, you're not in love. If you look and think on the lines of "WOW, that's a great looking body.....can't compare to XXXXXX, but still a looker". Guess what, you're in love.


The Greeks had 5 different words for love depending on the type of love it was. English has 1. Talk about a jip, and a lot of uneeded confusion.


And remember, me and Kathy love you! (Agape)


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Ann Landers had a great classic column on how to tell love from infatuation. I have a yellowed copy of it in a scrapbook (circa 1970's) but I also found it on the internet:


In addition to what Ann writes, I'll also tell you that love doesn't give you black and blue marks, love isn't jealous or possessive, love is never degrading or cruel even during a spat. Love isn't competitive or a contest of wills. Love is supportive... and that's enough to give you food for thought.




P.S. to Pam: Scratch-Head.gif

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