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hubby & I we both are on different level of our spiritual journey


HostAsha

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I feel my hubby is very evolved in his spiritual growth journey, there are some things he is very good  like taking care of his responsibilities, he is amazing  dad, & human being but he is also very stubborn man & won't change his point of views to make other person happy, which sometimes does create conflict in our relationship, I   love him  & grateful for having him by my side, but my love is very conditional some times, I feel very annoyed when he won't do certain things which makes me happy. for example I feel we both have worked our tail off in achieving our American dream from day I landed in this country some 25 years ago, & after getting stroke at young age, I do have sense of urgency. I like to experience all finer things in life & I do feel I deserve every single bit of it.  Finer things in life does make me happy  though my happiness doubles if he also enjoys those things with me, versus, he does not care about it as much, he will be happy in all things, he thinks he gets equal joy from simple things in life & donate rest of the money away. versus my feeling is enjoy those finer things in life too. I don't want to cut corners on myself or my family to be donated away any more. I feel all my younger years i have made sacrifices & made peace with living in scarcity when I was young & able bodied person.  Now I want to enjoy with whatever abilities are still left with me. I know I need to work on my own happiness & don't worry about whether he joins in or not, & he needs to learn to enjoy things which gives his family pleasure.  he is very detached from us in that sense, his joy is not attached to seeing his family happy. So I am all torn & confused & still work in progress on my spiritual awakening path

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ASHA, sometimes you just have to be happy because he is happy. You can never have a 50/50 balance in a marriage, it is more like 60/40, with one or the other comprising. I wish it was true that we grow together and in some part of our marriage we do but we also need to be free to be individuals as well. He is a good man, you are a good woman, sometimes that has to be enough.

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Marriage and compromise mean the same thing, I feel.

 

It's very hard Asha, when both parties aren't on the same page.

 

Most of the time, I settle for the same chapter. 

 

Some days, I'm happy we are even 'reading' the same book!

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