slowe's Blog

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In the beginning, the DRs told us that pretty much 6 months was the time when he would do the most healing. Well, we're 5 1/2 months into that time frame, and he still has big issues with fatigue. Not just good days and bad days, but days when he's so tired he basically sits on the couch, reads the paper, naps, watches a little tv, tries to get the breakfast dished done by lunch, etc.


He's had three or four of those in a row this week.


Granted, we're in the midst of moving into a new, bigger house with the kids and grandkids, and even though the movers are doing most of the packing and moving, there's still a lot of 'little" things to be done. Things that before the stroke he could have done in his sleep are suddenly huge projects that he has to chop up into little pieces and do a little at a time.


He used to do all the housework, grocery shopping, and cooking. Now, he needs help with all of those. I work all day, come home and help him cook, and then pretty much do most of the dishes. I'm not trying to complain, because I know he just doesn't have the stamina do do it all anymore.


I just wish I had a guarantee that on "day X" it would all be better.


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No guarentees to be made here. I am very much in the same situation except I was always the cook. Patrick did the laundry, kept the house picked up, did the dishes, kept the floors mopped....(Do I sound like a bum yet???) and I did the cleaning of bathrooms and the cooking when I was home (and in the mood). I was the one who worked full time, he worked part time, and it worked pretty well for us. Of course after his stroke, it all shifted to me. He is getting better slowly but consistantly, and he is starting to take on some chores again. I try to think of all the chores being mine now, like it or not, and so when he is able to get some of the things done, it seems more like a favor to me. As tidy as you may like to keep your house, you may need to let them slide and try not to focus on them TOO much. You know one way or another you will eat, you willl get towels and underwear washed, and anything else is just a bonus. I also try to remember that the brain heals while he sleeps, so it doesn't bother me too much anymore when he needs a nap. Hopefully he will wake up a bit healthier!


Take care


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The six month date is incorrect. There are many stroke survivors, including myself, who agree that progress continues for years. It slows down, may even stop for awhile, but so far I have heard of no one who does not continue to see progress.


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I want to ditto what Lin said up above. I was told I'd be all better at 6 months too, was I crushed when my 6 month anniversary came and went and I wasn't all better. No one can give a time frame, we all recover at different paces and I'm 3 plus years out and I'm still making gains. So chuck that 6 month idea out of the window, it is wrong and cruel to tell a survivor that in 6 months they'll be better.


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I wish to there was a "guarantee" but unfortunately there is not. Chris is one year post stroke and is still extremely tired most days. I have brought this up to his doctors and it must be a normal thing.


I was also told that recovery and improvement can last for years. You can't put a time frame on a survivors recovery.


We take it now one day at a time. There is no projecting to the future, we can't even project to the next week. I found it takes alot of patience for me, which is not one of my best virtues.


Hang in there............


Kim smile.gif

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