hey Butch:

when I just got admitted in rehab still needed wheelchair to go anywhere, I was arguing with doctor to release me such that I can go back to my work, he was shocked he was like do you even realise what that means, do u think you can still do the work, and I gladly told him in programming if you know 3 simple rules you should be ok, and it took me year to come back to work part time, and I m still not there yet, lot of things have changed at work, so have to relearn everything,and I realise now that I m getting that satisfaction at cost of leaving my child alone, and I started to question is it worth it.

but having goal of going back to work is good goal nonethless

Asha

Butch

Don and I had the same "renewing crisis" when it was time for his driver's license to be renewed. I, of course, felt exactly like you and with good reason. But it's a stroke thing for the survivor---a goal they may never reach but they need to believe in in the early stages. It might take them 1/2 way or more to places they wouldn't get to without that goal hanging out there. So I guess you weight up the budget issue of renewal against the issue of self-esteem and do your best.

Jean

Butch,

I have to agree with Phyllis, if the license isn't to much to renew, renew it. I'm 4 years post stroke, I still cannot drive, but it still bothers me that my drivers license was allowed to expire. Part of why it bothers me is I felt that at the beginning, how could they know I wouldn't drive again? I thought they gave up on me at the beginning and that hurt. But that is how I felt, that is my life, I'm not suggesting that is what you are doing. But whether she'll ever cut hair again, hope is a huge factor in recovery. It is a process for a new survivor to come to terms with never doing their chosen profession again. It may take a year or so for her to accept that, but it is all part of the acceptance process. It isn't easy letting go of the past and embracing the future, especially when the future is unknown.

Pam

when i was first attending outpatient rehab, i expressed (badly-i was still aphasic at the time)to my first outpatient speech therapistthat i had to return to work and get off disability because my patients would really not do well if i was out for too long. she looked at me with pity and said that i could always let go of my patients and get new ones later. it was clear that she believed that i would never go back to work again. i was extremely p****d off (there i go again, Jean)at her for her attitude and told her so. 8.5 years later, my old rehab doctor, whlie evaluating my husband for his TBI, turned to me and said, "Don't i know you from somewhere?" he had discharged me in 2000. i am now back to work as a psychiatrist 60 hours/wk, which is as full time as i want to be.

BTW, i was once diagnosed with lupus, which Lisa has. my diagnosis has been changed to antiphospholipid antibody syndrome, an autoimmine disease which shares some symptoms with lupus.

just speaking for myself, being on disability really sucked for me. i do a happy dance every day i get to go to work.

sandy