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Aphasia between friends...




Aphasia between friends...


I had lunch Friday with my best friend, and afterwards driving home I had to laugh at how I pantomime and gesture to assist my lack of words.


I was telling her about my purchase of garden plants and of course I could not remember the names of the plants. I began by telling her about this double, almost black, fragile flower that I had ordered, and trying to remember the name I started moving my hands to describe delicate and getting out the word "exotic" which it isn't, but looks like it is. Then I tried cupping my hand and pointing my fingers down to try and describe what the flower looked like. Absolutely nothing that would cue her to say "Columbine" but of course being my friend for 30 years, she got it on the first try, guaranteed no one else would have.


The instinctive knowledge of what I was trying to say or describe is proof of an intricate bond that has developed over thirty years of friendship. We went through our teenage years, heartaches, failed marriages, living in different areas of North America, grief, happiness, joy, laughter and tears, and now my mind and body issues.


After my stroke I had my boyfriend call her, and of course she got to the hospital as fast as she could. With the few words I had, I asked her to tell Mom and Dad what had happened to me in person when she got home. She agreed it would be the best way to tell them and went the next morning.


She and Mom sat down in the living room by Dad's chair and she told the story of my heart attack and then 6 days later the stroke, that I could not talk much and what the cardiologist had told her at the hospital. After she was through with the story, Mom looked at her and said, "Now tell it again louder so her Dad can hear". I think this was the hardest thing she had ever done, telling my parents that their daughter was in the Cardiac ICU, and to have to repeat the story, just about did her in. But yet she did and would do it again in a heartbeat, because she is my friend.


Friends make life worth while. Here's to the best friend I have.







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Deep friendship and/or knowledge of the person with aphasia really does make a difference in figuring out the "aphasic language." Don and I can do what you and your friend can. It does take some practice, though, in the beginning.


Nice tribute to your friend......




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You and Jean are right, really knowing a person helps so much when you are dealing with aphasia. Sometimes I fear I don't let Patrick try hard enough to come up a word, I just instinctively fill it in. I try to be aware of doing this, and only help him when he wants me to.


Best friends truly are the best!




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