Just got back on the air again. No, it wasn't my computer this time, it was my phone line. Someone dug up the cable and we went off the air for four days. Another of the little bumps on my way to Peaceful Street.

This has been one of those muddled weeks as all my planned working on the house etc went haywire. It is as if some gremlins crept in and re-arranged life again. None of the people I had lined up could do any work for at least another couple of weeks. I guess this is down to the storms we had in June and the continuing clean-up from that. No tradesmen have had to look for work since. My neighbour is still waiting for his front fence to be repaired.

We still have the funeral to go to. My daughter's father-in-law Don, died on Thurday of last week. He had not been to the doctor for almost twelve months, had no history of heart disease ( he was as fit as a mallee bull) and dropped dead of a massive heart attack. His doctor was also away so an autopsy was ordered and that of course delayed everything. The funeral will now be held on Friday 16th at 1pm. We will drive up on Thursday, spent some time with our daughter and her family, then attend the funeral on Friday, stay another night and come home. It is four hours drive north of here.

Unfortunately it overlaps with another event. I took this time to have a break from Ray as I have a women's weekend starting on Friday 16th at 2pm. Yes, 2pm. So I will miss most of it. It was the highlight of last year and I have so been looking forward to it. The women of our stroke suport group get together for three days and have a ball. Now I will miss most of the weekend. I am so upset that these two events clashed. For once I was looking forward to something that would have been a real treat for me.

I feel as if I am making a fuss over nothing here. I...I...I...I know, I am supposed to be the unselfish caregiver, the family stalward, the good citizen, the good friend, the good companion. Somewhere in all of that there is room to build up a mighty head of resentment and at times like this when I see something I want to do slipping out of my grasp I want to sream "WHAT ABOUT ME AND MY PLANS?" It all seems so futile sometimes.

Apart from that I did rout some of the dustbunnies, brought down the cobwebs, re-arranged the furniture into a better position for summer. I didn't clean the paintwork out on the verandah, get a quote for the pergola, rub down the summer furniture. I doubt if any of that will get done between now and Christmas.

BUT I will get to see my Cairns family again, will get to see the little ones playing together. The two grandchildren from Cairns will get to see Oliver who of course was born after they were here in June. The little ones have had to live with the death of their beloved Poppy since last weekend so they should be ready to have some fun with Tori and Alex. I guess Oliver will still be oblivious to it all, he is ony twelve weeks old after all.

Ray was a little sad when I told him that Don had died. But I don't think he is able to hold on to emotions now and soon resumed watching the waitress pouring the teas and coffees and looking around at what the other people were doing. I guess of the two of us his is the more peaceful life.