Merry Christmas to me ! My present to myself is my progress. When I look back at last year I can see many improvements so it is obvious that my rehab is paying off. Last year we only had my mother-in-law for dinner and my husband cooked the whole dinner; my 94 year old mother-in-law cleaned up! I didn't invite my brother and his family because I knew I couldn't handle it. I remember sitting in the family room when dinner was being made and crying. I took a lorazapam and went to lay down so I could calm down. My emotions are SO much better...I seldom cry unless there is a real reason.

This year, we didn't have a tree but I was able to decorate the house so it looks Christmasy..the poinsettias really help. My mother-in-law is coming as usual (she is now 95) and I asked my brother and his wife, adult daughter and her cousin. Cards and gifts were kept to a minimum. I even was able to make banana bread and brownies (last week and then refrigerated them) and arranged an easy menu. I made a raspberry jello holiday salad today, I'll make a green bean casserole tomorrow and then things will be easy for Christmas Day. My husband picked up a honeybaked ham (our favorite), croissants from our bakery plus fruit tarts as a special dessert. Since I can stand in the kitchen for quite a while now, I did some other prep work so tomorrow when my mother-in-law comes I can be rested; we are going out for dinner, so I won't have a mess to content with.I can stand in the kitchen for quite a while now. We even have the leafs in the table and the tablecloth on. Jerry has been a godsend. I can tell nowadays he gets a little tired of waiting on me so I need to do what I can for myself and give him a big break. I have learned to pace myself. I will do a chore, rest a while and then do another one. God has helped me with it. I know He saved me and is helping and strengthening me daily. My faith has gotten so much stronger since my stoke - I know I am not alone ever...between this site and my God, I am indeed grateful this holiday season.

Just writing this is helpful for me to know how far I have come and how much I have learned. I am reading Kate Adamson's second book "Paralyzed but now Powerless". It is really good.

We have plans for New Years Eve with 6 other couples we've joined in past years. I have already found a pair of black slacks that fit (all the other are too small - the have stroke/gain weight syndrome) and I had them shortened because I can't wear heals "yet" - maybe never but the jury is still out on that. One day at a time. I repeat that over and over along with the serenity prayer.

Merry Christmas - I hope to blog again shortly after 2008 ring in. :giggle: