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in need of advice


angelllewis

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my name is angel and on jan. 16,2010 my dad who is 55 yrs old, had a hemorrhagic stroke. i will never forget that day ever. when we got to hospital they told us (my family) that dad had had a stroke but that was about all they could tell us at that point. we were all so very scared my dad is our bestfriend. it was just devastating seeing our dad with a tube down his throat and hooked to all these machines. then they told us that we had to send him to another hospital because they were better equipped to handle and treat dad. the hospital that we first took dad to was very good to dad and our family and when we got him to kettering hospital they too were wonderful to our dad. they took wonderful care of dad there. but we got very heartbreaking news, the doctors did a cat scan of dads head and dad had a huge bloodclot in the middle of his brain right by the brainstem. dad also had sweeling so they had to put a drain in to relieve the pressure and when they did that they told us that dad was very critical and they we needed to pray because they had done everything medically possible to help him that it was in gods hands. so we all did just that we prayed for dad and so did dads doctors they were so wonderful and caring doctors. and dad started to wake up finally but it wasnt a normal awake it was like a foggy awake but dad could see us and he could squeeze our hands with his right hand, dad had full movement of his right side but not the left, and let me tell you it was like we had won the lottery we were able to communicate with dad some it was a joyous moment and all thanks to god. slowly we were able to get dad to answer yes and no questions by blinking his eyes because dad has a trache and resporator and has a feeding tube in. even the doctors and staff at kettering couldnt believe how well dad was recovering and we all knew that it was because of gods grace. they had even started trying to wean dad off the resporator and dad was doing great but then he got a clog in his tube and he started tochoke and the staff told us that it was a bad clog and that it had stressed dad out so they put him back on the resporator to help calm him. and we all never stopped praying for dad. but i dont know what happened but that eposide seem to be a mager set back for dad he started not responding to us stopped tolerating being weaned off the resporator and he stopped moving his right side as well. we were all devastated but the doctors told us that we just have to be patient and wait. again everyone who has had a part in caring for dad have been very wonderful to him and us and we thank god for that. but it is so hard to see my dad like this but we have all been steadfast in our prayers and being here everyday to set with dad and talk to him and stimulate him and most of all love him. i sit here and i watch my mom shes so caring and loving when it comes to dad shes by his side from sun up to sun down no matter what. she is also very steadfast in her prayers to god. she tries to be so strong for us kids and for dad but i see it in her eyes shes hetting tired and its wearing on her but she hasnt given up on dad and she never will. she says that dad is her life her soulmate and that when she married him she married him in sickness and health. me and my 2 sisters, missy and amanda, are here for mom and dad everyday. my sister missy hs a husband and 2 wonderful kids but she is here everytime that she can be and my sister amanda is pregnant and aslo has a husband but she too is also here when she can be also. i too am here whenever its possible but its been my poor mom who has been her every single day and night. i hope that one day im as strong as she is. my sister in law is also here with their dad and moms grandkids whenever they can be. our family is very close now and my dad is the center of it all. our family has had a really rough couple of years 2 years ago on aug.24,2008 we lost my brother he was killed at ak steel it was a terrible loss. mikey, thats my brother name, was my dads bestfriend they did everything together and he was the only son mom and dad had. mikey was my moms pride and joy ,as all her kids are, loosing mikey was hard for us all and then 2 weeks later dad became very ill and we almost lost him but the lord healed him and gave him back to us. i can never understand what mom and dad went through, loosing a child, and i pray i never have to but i know it was really really hard but we all pulled together as a family and we all got through it and we still have mikeys wife and two kids in our life so its like a little bit of mikey lives on here on earth. so thats why its so hard for us right now. dadno longerbmoves hisright side at all but he has started moving his left side a little and he also rarely communicates with us anymore but i do know that gods mercy is new everyday and that with god all things are possible. we are staying steadfast in our prayers but its so hard to see dad like this i just wish i could trade places with him im younger and stronger and mom and dad have been through enough. please i would love to hear some stories of people who have had a hemorrhagic stroke and survived it.and from the family members who have had to go through dealing with a loved one who has had a stroke. i would love to hear from people who have had a stroke and have them tell me what they were thinking as they laid there in bed probably trapped in their body being able hear and know whatwas going on around them and not being able to communicate your needs. i would also love to know what helped them to stay strong and fight to come back and pull through. any information will be greatly appericated not just for me but for mom because no matter how us kids feel mom has to be feeling it 10x more and going through 10x more than we are. i know that dad is still here with us because when i look at him i see him inside there and i know godis working on dad because everyone says that we they come in here to see dad that they thought he would look much worse tahn he does. i will continue praying for my dad and my mom and i know that no matter what is too come that god will be there right next to us carrying us through it all but it is always wonderful hearing from some who has been in our shoes. so please let me know what u have experienced with this and god bless you all and i will be praying for everyone who has had to or are going through what we are right now

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hi Angel:

 

welcome to wonderful world of blogging. I am sorry for your dad's stroke. I stroked at age 34 which left me paralysed on left side of my body in 2004. Like your family my family rallied for me at the hospital, and after 4 weeks in ICU & 3 weeks at rehab I returned home, and since that day has been rebuilding my life. Today I can walk, drive and take care of my family. but it's the hardest struggle for everyone included in my life. BTW I will suggest you to post this post on message board such that you get more response & viewpoints of others who have been through similar journey. Though I have found blogging very therupetic for my soul and will recommend to everyone.

 

Asha

 

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Angel, there is a lot to read on this site. Read the posts from survivors and also the Bios which are in the Gallery and that will give you a good idea. If you see a person's name who has a good story that you would like to know more about click on their name, go to their profile and send them a message. People here are willing to share a lot about their lives to help others.

 

No-one knows what the recovery time-line looks like. Brainstem stroke survivors have had miraculous recoveries in the past, but not all do. It is a "wait and see" situation but the more you help and encourage the better the recovery is ( well I think so anyway!)

 

We are not docotors or experts, we are just ordinary people, caregivers helping our survivors or survivors on the road to recovery.

 

Welcome to the blogworld, hope you will find the hope and support you need.

 

Sue.

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