• entries
  • comments
  • views

five women in a spa



I went to my Women’s weekend yesterday. Well, I didn’t go for the whole weekend but just for a day and I enjoyed that immensely. Especially as Trev had volunteered to look after Ray for the day and I was confident that nothing would go wrong, I could just relax and enjoy the day.


I am blessed that since Ray has been off the Metformin and on insulin twice a day his condition has improved, his faecal incontinence has returned to infrequent and his falls have halved. I don’t know how long this will continue to be the case but it feels so wonderful not to have to do many loads of laundry through the week. And what a saving on energy etc it is not having all those clean-ups to do.


The day was bright and sunny and a good 80 degrees and no blustery wind or anything else to spoil a perfect day. As soon as I got to the venue I went into the spa. Well as all women know a spa with five women in it is a very noisy place, we talked about all kinds of things slipping from subject to subject effortlessly. As one woman left another climbed in to take her place so it was a very enjoyable 40 minutes or so.


I would have stayed in longer but the program said: MASSAGE Sue W 11.45am so obediently I went off and had a lovely relaxing massage. The masseuse showed me how to loosen the tension in my legs and lower back with a few easy exercises. I will take note of the pressure points and hope I can stop some of those sleepless nights when the back aches and the legs twitch and I don’t sleep.


We have a small marquee so lunch was there, luscious salad and cold meat rolls and platters piled with fruit. There was also wine flowing like water but I let it flow by me and drank the water instead. If I had been there the whole weekend that might have been different but I don’t drink and drive, if I am driving I don't drink at all.


A lot of the women, both caregivers and survivors, went off for an afternoon siesta as they had had a late night Friday night. Friday night is the “release the tension” night so is usually quite intense and the stories I heard sounded as if that had not changed this time.


I stayed up with a few others, sitting in the marquee, talking and laughing. One of the women who had gone to a friend’s place for lunch came back with a tray of oysters and prawns so we helped her eat them. These six caregivers sat and quietly ate so as not to wake up their sleeping companions…more likely so they didn’t have to share with them too…lol. I do like fresh oysters and prawns are my idea of heavenly food.


As evening approached one of the women suggested I might like to shower and change and could use her room so I did that. I had a new blouse I quite fancied but of course others, younger and slimmer, came out in such glamorous outfits.. No I didn’t feel envious I once looked like that and as caregivers and female survivors we do need to be able to dress up and look and feel good from time to time. As women we can cheer others on so we clapped and wolf whistles as each new “diva” appeared.


Dinner was good but the service was so slow. We shared the dining room with the dance floor with others but soon had the floor bouncing. Some people danced awkwardly, some with more grace and rhythm but who cared? We all ENJOYED some dancing in whatever fashion we are now able to. The female survivors particularly feel free in this situation to express themselves, dancing with the aid of a stick or a chair or on the arm of one of the other women. It is always a grand sight to behold.


As the time approached for me to go home I felt a bit like Cinderella, but I was so glad I got to experience that day of perfect freedom. I got to talk and laugh and swim and eat oysters and prawns, to dance and sing and enjoy myself in the company of others. I am truly blessed.


Recommended Comments

What a deliciously wonderful your day sounds. I am so glad that you have these little respites. I am quite green!

Link to comment
Guest lwisman




Good to hear you had a good relaxing day. I know this helps.


I may have said this before, but you are an inspiration to many of us on the board. It is amazing what you go through. You have not only Ray, but your mom which make your interactions interesting to say the least. I know it is not easy for you, but also know that you have to do what you have to do. :)


More power to you!

Link to comment



I am so happy for you. I feel all caregivers need this kind of breaks often so that going back to stressful job of caregiving can still be done. you have great son who looks after his dad so that you can get respite. he has your compassionate heart.



Link to comment

Sue: just getting through your reading and experiencing it mentally myself, I am in a better place tonight. I am glad you had your day and so fully enjoyed it. Debbie

Link to comment
Add a comment...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.