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a good update :)


CagedBird

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Hi everyone I just wanted to say I feel better now. Ever since I finished therapy I had been feeling negative. My last 2 blogs and last post on the forums pretty much summed up how I was feeling but Im better now. I talked to some of my friends and prayed. I continue to read the bible daily. I get frustrated when I dont see results right away and even after waiting for years but I was reminded that faith is the evidence of things hoped for and not seen. Even though I can't see it, that doesn't mean God isn't healing me. I can't see my brain and never will but God still has the power to fix the damage that has been done. I had to regain my composure for my next speaking engagement on Friday. I haven't even wrote my speech yet but I will. It seems like every time I go speak, I am a blessing to others but bad things start to happen to me. Its like's the evil one does not want me to go around encouraging others so things start to come my way to distract me and take my mind to the negative away from the positive. I realized this and am now ready to fight back and not let anyone or anything take away my happiness.

I have wonderful news. Since I started working, I bought my own car. I have been driving back and forth to work everyday and to the store. I am getting better and I feel a lot better driving my own car. I spoke with someone from the DMV and they said I should be able to get my license if I just pass the test. I have taken the test more than once in the past and I remember only being issued a permit because of the restrictions from the medical review board but maybe this time around I will finally get my license. I already purchased a car and insurance so it would suck if I got denied a license again. Please keep me in your prayers as Im practicing driving more on the busy roads and pray that I will pass the road test next week when I go get my license.

 

I also planned another trip. This weekend I will be taking a bus again to visit my friend in Charlotte and we are going to Carowinds (a theme park). I purchased tickets for the bus route that will take me straight there and bring me straight back so I think I will be ok. Now I just hope I will be able to ride all the rides I want when I get there! My birthday is next Tuesday but I have to work so this weekend is supposed to be my present to myself. Hopefully my license will be another present!

I am also thinking about learning to swim or at least being more comfortable in water. One of my co-workers was a swim instructor for 10 years and taught people with disabilities how to swim. I have never known how to swim and always been scared of water so I never get in it when I go to the beach but she offered to teach me some exercises and techniques some times after work. I think I will go for it. I just get so tired of feeling like I don't live my life to the fullest because Im constantly sitting around waiting for my hand to move again or my toes to start wiggling so I can enjoy my life. Now I plan to just go back to making the best of it and leave everything else in God hands.

This verse from the Bible really helped me: Habakkuk 2:3

3 For the vision is yet for an appointed time;

But at the end it will speak, and it will not lie.

Though it tarries, wait for it;

Because it will surely come,

It will not tarry.

 

I know Bible scriptures can be interpreted freely but I think of this one as the vision being me made completely whole and having a bigger testimony and I just have to wait for it to happen and just be patient. I am glad Im feeling better. I can be happy and not put on a mask to act happy :)

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Katrina:

 

I was so overjoyed reading your this blog. you are growing up nicely. I feel the same way about my hand. we can't wait to be happy & do things we love to do when our hand decides to come back. life & time does not stop for anyone. So have to start enjoying & living life to fullest with whatever deficits you have right now. I was depressed & sad for first 2 years till I realized how it affected our son & my hubby who has chose to ride in this rollercoaster ride with me. I realized that's disservice to people I love the most, so I decided to go on with this life's journey with happy outlook. I feel happiness is a choice & I m glad I made that choice few years. our life is so much richer due to that choice, yes my left hand still does not work, but I have had countless wonderful moments with my family that my left hand does not matter as much. I am glad I am able to do so many things with just 1 hand.

 

Asha

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I'm praying you get your license and hope you had a good read on what you needed to do to insure you pass the tests, written and driving the car.

 

Don quit on therapy at home, Walmart has some stuff you can use at home for strengthening of arms/hand and legs. You gotta keep going or you loose what you got! I did that! :big_grin:

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Sweetie, you're doing wonderfully. I'm new here, but can see you've accomplished a great deal more than many people who have never had obstacles like yours to overcome.

 

I"m sure you'll have success in whatever you undertake. You seem like a lovely young lady and I wish you all the happiness you deserve!

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