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Driving and other questions


lydiacevedo

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I asked to extend my retirement day by 1, that way I could be paid for any unused paid time off I have. HR said that was not a problem.

 

Friends, family and co-workers are beginning to find out - because I have started talking about it - that July 1st will be my last day. Everyone has the same set of questions ;

1. Why?

2. Are you ok with that?

3. Do you need to talk about it?

 

They all look at me skeptically when I tell them I am very at peace with the whole thing, even starting to look forward to it. I LIKE the idea of being home all day and being able to keep house, take care of Sam, and do whatever I want to do with myself. I have plenty of hobbies and plans. I won't be bored.

 

Given the things that have been going on with me, physically, I think retiring is really the best thing for me.

 

I'm 5.5 months post stroke. A lot of the swelling has gone down. We've found a couple of new "normals" that are a little concerning.

 

1. My eyes spasm all day long. It affects my vision and focus. I have been given a low dose of valium to help deal with it and told I should not drive.

2. Stress makes the eye spasms worse, and makes me more tired than usual - to the point I can't staty awake. We are evaluating my zoloft dose and may change it again, if the addition of the valium doesn't help that too.

3. It is time for another MRI since I am active and seemingly coherent at all times, but have "lost" periods of time as small as a few minutes and as great as over an hour - there is just plain no memory of the time periods. That one bothers my doctors a little, hence the new MRI and possibly other tests.

 

So, there I am. The reasons to go ahead and retire are really starting to outweigh the reasons not to. I think, for some of my friends/family, the fact that I am retiring and taking disability is really a bigger hit to them than it is to me. There are still a few who seem to have thought that the stroke was "nothing major, serious, or all that bad." As it turns out, it took more out of me and made more changes then they thought. Perhaps that makes them look at how fragile life really is, and that scares them.

 

I've experienced how fragile life is, first hand. I'm grateful I have the change to make some changes so that I can focus on the truely meaningful things in life - like family, happiness, love and friendship. The material things can be taken away at any moment, and in the end, we are not remembered for the things we had so much as for the things we did in life, for oursselves and for others.

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Both of those drugs you named are usually not recommended for stroke survivors according to my doctors. I didn't look on webMD to get their take on them. If the cause these changes like staying awake/alert, then I wouldn't drive, but that's me!

 

I had to show my drug list to the DMV when I got my licenses back. They said nothing on my list would interfere with me driving. At that time and now still I can't use my left hand. It was OK to take the actual driving test on the road with one hand on the wheel!

 

Life is fragile as you stated, so you can imagine a child growing up with a disability of not walking or use of both legs/feet or hands all their lives? That alone makes me accept the deficits of a stroke survivor that much more at my age when this persons struggled all their life!

 

It hurts my heart to read on here where members ask will they have to be like this all their lives? Right there they should be encouraged to get therapy as often as possible to get better.

 

So, I say try to get your driving license if you really want to drive again, nothing is impossible for any survivor in my mind! :Clap-Hands:

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Lydia:

I am so happy for you the way you are getting ready for your retirement. I know you will do great in your retirement since you already know what matters to you the most. I found it hard way how much my selfworth was associated with what kind of job I had. I guess I was proud of my education & comfort of material things my working brought.So I know I have told you many times but I don't want any of my friends here at SN also go through depression I went through.

 

hugs,

Asha

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Lydia, Good for you, dotting your i's and crossing your t's towards retirement day.:Dr_Evil: Have you filled out your disability papers to send them in July 2nd?

I am now retired 12 years. Sometimes I wake up not knowing what day it is. For every day is the same, no difference from weekdays and weekend days. I look at every day as a fresh breath of air.

I have always had my driving licenses but I knew my limitations after my stroke. I only drive locally on side streets. Freeway only in emergencies. I don't drive after dark if I can help it. My eyes have depth problems.

Lydia I'm sure you also know your limitations..

Some how I believe we relate being able to drive equals independence. So for me around town is just enough of independence that I don't feel like a prisoner. So, I wish you luck in getting your driver license back.:You-Rock:

As for you family and friends not thinking your stroke was a major upset, is just their ignorance. When they look at you, it could be them. Forgive them for they are just uninformed. You have been given the experience to open their experience.

I agree with you on life is so fragile. Money, objects we think we can't live without we come to the conclusion are useless. Family, relationships, love for fellow man and pets that care for us and give us love is what matters. remembertolaugh, Jeannie :cocktail:

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