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Summer is gone



Just thinking the last few days how a lot has changed this past summer. Over the past years 75% or better of the yard work and other projects were mine to accomplish. Daddy in law was here to supervise me and just chew the fat with. I had my health and could go for hours working inside or out. I had the habbit of when I saw my father in law doing some work he shouldn't of dropping what I was doing and do the job for him.


This past summer all that changed. Daddy in law is gone. Granted he is better off now, no more pain or suffering, but that doesn't make missing him any easier at times. I miss him being there supervising me and chewing the fat. Thankfully I have the memories of him being here, and at times I tend to walk up to his house and just sit where we sat to chat. There are times I think he is talking to me from the grave.


Another change, I can't do the work I used to do. As most of you know my health went to pot as I had the silent heart attack. I am able to get a little house work done, but I am slower than molasses compared to how I used to be able to do it. Guess what really got me going is watching kitty's niece and nephew and a couple of their friends taking down the weeds outside that was my job in the past. For the last few days they have been at it, and all I could do was sit on the porch and watch. I did try to help. I got the lopers out, cut 2 weeds and was worn out. Needless to say I got mad at myself when I saw these young people going at it like I did and I couldn't. Boy did I ever hear daddy in law from the grave, "serves you right you did it to me" again.


Hopefully once they get this defibulator in and I heal, I will be able to regain my stamina and some strength back. Then in a sense like our survivors I will have to learn my limitations when comes to getting things done around here. To tell the truth I can't wait for that day to come. I think at times I some how empithyze with our survivors as they battle back to some sort of normalcy.


Sorry for the rambling, just hoping this will help me accept my new way of life getting things done.


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Mike: we talked tonight about you understanding a bit about being a Stroke Survivor. Being able to accept that life has drastically changed and will not be the same. About the work at recovery and also somewhat the responsibility of having to take care of home and family and not being able to do that any longer.


So we take one day at a time. We support and encourage and yet realize that all that is for naught, if we ourselves do not have the courage or energy to move on, accept the good with the bad and still find hope for what may come.


I am vunerable tonight: RLT, our Host Sue, you, Kitty and our dear Rose. I go day to day, at times feeling sorry for myself and where do I go from here; then read of all of you. Know I have it easy, but where in all this pain is hope?


So one step forward, one task crossed off the list. And we move on. Thankful for life, for the season change and reminders that Mother Nature continues regardless. Just had a glass of wine in the back yard. Back to summer this week here, with Fall returning for the weekend. And yes, there is a bigger motion and continuance than me. Be well, Debbie

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I'm sure it will help Mike. You been through the tunnel and now can see the light. I'm still praying for you and family!


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things do change in life. we are all life survivors. as we grow old we can't expect to do same things we were able to do in our youth. Though I feel as a survivor of stroke & heart attack life changes in an instant, so it becomes hard to accept new reality. but by accepting your life today you are able to make best out of your life. I feel nothing in life is permanant youth, beauty or wealth. only change is permnant. & let me assure you change in life does not mean bad, its just different than life you were so used to before. So accept change & move on with life.



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So speaks the Guru Asha,so listen up Mike, life changes and acceptance changes us for the better. We get older and wiser.


Years ago I had viral pneumonia and six weeks on the couch to get my lungs to return to normal, so I have experience of watching others do what I wished I could do. You'll get better and stronger after the op - but it will take a lot of patience to do so.



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