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Will anything work?

Ethyl17

Entry posted by Ethyl17

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I am trying to slow things down here. Do I know what I am doing? No way.

 

Right now I can't find Kira. The fireworks are making her crazy and this is a big house with a lot of hiding places. Bruce is still wide awake, for the same reason. Temperature is so-so, humidity and I am sitting here trying to decide if I turn off the AC and open the windows for overnight. Last night was a true gift, but tonight the humidity is to be on the rise.

 

So we have the new caregivers on board, schedule is good. But Bruce is still having difficulty and part of me really thinks he is using this as yet another way to avoid accepting responsibility for himself. His bottom has opened up - keep sitting all day and you will be buying yourself a hospital stay.

 

Had a terrible week last with the incontinence and his refusal to work with the new caregivers I spent the weekend talking to him, doing quiet stuff here, out every day. He is good with me. How can you refuse the one who feeds you? We agreed to Brush, Floss, Toilet and change into Night Clothes. His new night routine. I also do a nice wash up, but I respect that that is personal and intimate.

 

Monday, good going with Pema. Tonight, back to the same even though he promised me when I left for work. We even discussed it with Cathy when she came.

 

I was thinking that his self-esteem was important. This was a man who was meticulous in his personal grooming. Takes basically no interest now, but I thought if I made it a priority, he would see it was important for both of us. So Monday was shower, shave, nails, personal grooming.

 

Today we had Pharmacy and since our Dehumidifier died after 30 years - LOL, took Bruce to purchase a new one. Only stipulations were 700 square feet and I have to be able to lift it and get it down a flight of narrow stairs. Salesman took Bruce, in the WC, to purchase it and Bruce did the selection.

 

All of this, I am thinking, is working towards self-esteem. But tonight am thinking I have no clue.

 

Well Kira has just reappeared, ready for bed and I am tired, discouraged and tomorrow will be a down day due to the weather and we will have yet another talk. Debbie

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HostAsha

Debbie :

 

I am sorry you are having bad day today, I don't know the whole story, but try making Bruce do more for himself like all his ADL by himself, maybe in the begining yours & therapists watch once you feel he is safe enough to do it alone, you should allow him to do that & slowly give more responsibility I feel that increases person's selfesteem too when you feel you are contributing into family dymamics you feel better about yourself. I know thats what worked for me once I got rid of fulltime help at home, I felt better about myself. today with one hand I can do almost everything around the house.yes it takes me more time but important thing is job gets done.

 

Asha

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ruthpill

Debbie,

I know that incontinence is a terrible bummer. it is so discouraging. I hate to hear that Bruce has a bed sore. That is terrible. Bruce has to move a little more. William does not move that much. But, I guess that it is enough to keep him from getting a bedsore. He walks with assistance to the restroom and the bed and the recliner and of course swimming daily.

I insist on the daily shower. William hates to have his nails trimmed. He keeps remembering the one time that I snipped the tip of his finger. One time,...never to be forgotten.

Wm does let his caregiver give him a shower if I have a long day at work. He knows that he needs to give me a break and does have a shower by her. But, it is very infrequent. I fight on the shower thing. But, I know that it is a form of therapy and makes him feel good.

Tell, Bruce. That I know he is doing well and can even do better.

Debbie, keep up your spirits. Take Bruce out more. Does he walk to and from the car? that is always good therapy. I have Wm walk to and from the car. So going out is always good exercise.

We have made it to the pool and did our thing. Now it is the 4th of July and we have alot of military stuff to watch on TV.

Ruth

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