One more week to go, with the work schedule and people on vacation. I always leave my paycheck for Bruce to open. He has so much fun breaking it down. But I did realize if I can continue to do 25 hours a week, leave Bruce alone a few hours, I can cover caregivers and my health insurance, without taking anything from the house finances. So that is something to consider.

Mary Beth is recovering well from surgery. She is due to go back to work on Monday, but still can't find comfortable clothing. With what I have bought for her and what she has taken from here, I find that hard to believe, so just think she is anxious. Her husband goes on a seven day schedule this week, for a month. Happens every year and they can sure use the money. But think that also may be part of it.

Most of you have already read that Bruce's friend was a no show and my feelings on that.

This week was tough on Bruce: we messed up Cathy's schedule on Tuesday. Bruce thought we were out on a jaunt, then off I was and he with a caregiver. Wednesday Erma forgot us, so got here late. Thursday, Cathy was late. Plus Bruce was recovering from oral surgery. We were able to manage two hours off caregivers and Erma and Pema have my house in tip-top shape, for guests who never arrived. But good for Bruce and I.

When I did not hear from the friend on Wednesday-Thursday, I knew he was going to be a no-show. I should have taken it off the calendar and made some excuse to Bruce. Then if he had showed, it would have been fun, instead of a disappointment. But I had plan 2 in effect and tomorrow is our normal Farm Market and Groceries. Bruce did work on the lists and coupons this afternoon, while I prepped dinner.

I did insist on the AFO all day today and will again tomorrow. Caregivers give in to him when he asks to have it taken off. Bruce has the second round of oral surgery on Monday, so will also need shower tomorrow. He said he wants to get out on the deck to work on his flower boxes. My goal here is to get him to accept the responsibility that comes along with staying alone. What are your plans, your goals for the day. Not just what I have planned. I think I have accepted that Bruce no longer considers me. If I call him on something, he will acknowledge our new relationship, but he noticed my stomach grumbling the other day and said "you are hungry." But that did not interfere with what he wanted which was dress, out and about. He not once thought take a break, get something to eat and then we will move on.

It is a difficult thing to accept. I enforce what is truly important. We have dinner together now maybe four nights a week and I will not compete with the TV. I know this is very difficult from him. But the alternative is a bowl of cereal and the TV vs Ribs on the grill, corn on the cob and a potato salad. Bruce is going for the food - no brainer.

My goal in all of this is really not me. Those of you who had to return to work right away found this out early on. If we want to continue to live in this house, have heat and eat, you have to step up. Because I can not do both. Bruce wants to stay alone, but still does not understand that does not mean wetting yourself and channel surfing the TV until Debbie (or a caregiver) gets here. He has to have an agenda, a plan. What are you going to do for yourself while you are alone? What part of your recovery are you going to take responsibility for and work on each and every day?

So we start a new week and just try to move forward. Debbie