Yeah it makes me sad, every time Ray sees a new doctor, and they say can you raise your arm, so he picks up the bad arm with his good; they are so thoughtless really. I mean, it must be in his chart. When he's feeling low, I am always trying to tell him to think on the bright side but how can I deny what he has lost?

I even told my doctor, after he said my carotid test was perfect, why does my neck feel so tight all the time and he said "stress". Did he offer any solutions, no. I know going to the gym would be a big help, but I can't even think about it now with Ray having seizures constantly from his med changes. A year ago is when they started, and I knew I couldn't leave him alone anymore....eventually if leveled off and I did get to the gym once or twice a week (down from maybe four times a week before the stroke) barely enough to make a difference though.

Livin' the dream, yeah!

I sure hope you complained to the lady about his 'surveillance'. You need to put forth your own grievances so he isn't the one with all the power of being displeased and complaining.

I am so glad you are feeling better with the new developements. Keep talking Nancy, it is therapeutic and we will keep listening and praying.

oh yes i definatley pointed out the mirror....

Let me ask to be sure.... do the rules say you have to keep you car in the garage? If not, I'm guessing what is the burr up mirror man's butt is that he became USED TO not having a neighbor, and liked having an unobstructed view of everything going on - and now that there is a neighbor, it's cuts his nosiness down to just YOU!

exactley, ...... there is no rule saying we specifically must park in our garage.. none... and you are correct the previous neighbors who lived here were older no kids no muss no fuss... when we came to look at the place they lived here but you would not have guessed.. 2 chairs a lamp and a bed in the bedroom with a couple dressers... it had pictures on the wall but everything was very impersonal, and they always parked in the garage and did everything very precise.. so us people who actually LIVE here are annoying to him... not so much WE are annoying but he annoys himself... he is one of those chronic complainers of life... but i am showing them i am willing to fix most anything but maybe he is the biggest problem to himself.... so yes, this spring will be interesting when i decide i want to sit outside i will find a way to have a pull down canopy curtain to have out when we are sitting there.... and if he complains I'm gonna flat out tell them he creeps me and my daughters out...

Nancy, I'm scooting in to say I can't get the picture in my mind how your patio, garage and the driveway is set up but I know it has to be frustrating with the money you have paid out already to live there by all the hoopla you are getting with a handicap husband. Then the mirror man, nosey rosie, wants to see what you do on your patio which is none of his damn business.

I will say you got more patients than me and that may be for Dan's sake being there. Will you be allowed to hang that sun blind on "Your Patio" if you choose to?? That would take care of his mirror views even if the sun comes in from another side.

Walmart got them now in the garden center in different widths but I think the lengths are the same. You got the patients of "Job" as the saying goes. If you guys get to make your Texas vacation run you'll see what I mean at my house.

i think if i hang it and its not visable to anyone except when being used.. i could also just get one of those tip umbrellas to... we are able to choose our own patio furniture... how generous of them lol....

Yes, do your share of complaining on HIM, to keep the records balanced, or it will look like he is the perfect one and you are all the problem!

Nancy: first off honey, so pleased you were able to get some sort of satisfaction as to the patio. Dan has to be able to get outside and those Condo reps know that. I know Dan can walk, but you have to insist the walkway be wide enough to accomodate his WC. Don't let them short-change you for the sake of "Mirror man." Get your contractor to draw up the walkway, submit it to the Condo Association and if you have to, get the ADA rules out. Plan for the future and if you never need that width, know the next family along will be better off for it.

I had thoughts like Fred - aluminum foil hung off the cars to reflect the sunlight - LOL. Honey, if you park in the Visitors places, you have to have Association approval. Otherwise, other owners are going to complain. It truly is neverending for you. If not a sun blind, can you do a lattice with like Morning Glories growing up it?

Nancy, we have a beautiful deck and yard. We were blocked on all sides with trees. But neighbors took down a tree that totally exposed one side of the deck. I purchased a very expensive canvas deck shade that fit on the upper rail, still not enough for Bruce. He put up lattice that went up another 3 feet and then had planters on deck level with Moon flowers and Morning Glories. The lattice came down in the fall. But this was way too much for just me to manage. The panels are bigger than me! Let alone the planters. So back to the canvas shade. And now, with all the storm damage, we lost a major tree in the back that exposes that side.

In the early days home, he was out on that deck every single morning with his coffee and paper. Now I have to practically force him out there. Long story, short. You make the best decisions you can. Eye to the future. And the beauty of the land of the disabled is that any improvement is a money maker. Debbie

After reading all about your issues with the condo association and neighbor, I think I have changed my mind about moving to a condo. lol I have been thinking toward the future and the maintenance of a home and yard are a lot when everything is up to me. The neighbor issue is something I guess you don't know about until you move in. We have nice neighbors here and most are younger but have been helpful to Larry and I. I hope everything works out for you and Dan there. You sure can use a break!

Julie

julie the condo is still perfect in terms of maintenance and the inside couldnt be more assessable .. i just got a bad egg for a neighbor and the dogs perpetuate the problem... so if you can be pet free that is gonna be a big key..... the other is read the rules really, really well.. and between the lines if there is a common area so breathtaking , that is to perfect then it probably is a look dont touch type of place... but if i can ever get enough money together i will build a house almost exactly like the condo... i can park in the visitors area... got permission to park there now..... they even moved the dumpster down to where it is suppossed to be to make room for me just today...