guess i spoke too soon
It just happened again. The same thing that happened 2 weeks ago before I went to work. Im laying on my back on my bed with my laptop in front of me surfing the web and I start to feel weird. "Here we go again" I think. "Oh no, God please help me." I say to myself as it feels like someone is squeezing my head. I let my laptop slide onto the bed as the "seizure" takes over. I close my eyes and cover my face as I try to keep from crying waiting for it to end. I think about calling out to my friend who is in the living room but I can't think of his name plus Im scared that if I open my mouth the only thing that will come out is a barely audible murmur and spit since my throat is burning with nausea. Just then it ends, I sit up. My friend came to my room to let me know he's leaving. All of this just happened to me. It happened 2 weeks ago too (minus the friend) but I went to work anyway and besides feeling lightheaded and anxiety, I was fine for the rest of the day. 3 days later was the night I fell off my bed probably from a "seizure."
I don't know how many of you read my last blog but I wrote about being afraid to go back to e-stim because I thought it might be triggering seizures. I haven't done it in weeks. But now the good part is I can go back to it. I thought I was doing okay since I didnt have any "seizures" since last week but today showed me that maybe my OT was right maybe the e-stim and seizures was just coincidence. As I wrote the other day, I have been eating 3 meals a day and taking my medicine regularly. I have not had breakfast this morning but I also rarely eat this early anyway. I had a big dinner lastnight and got 6-8 hours of sleep so I dont have a clue why this just happened to me. I remember everything that happened and I feel fine now. No headache, no lightheadedness. It is a horrible feeling but after it ends besides sadness I feel fine. From my ER and doctor visit, I learned that as long as I didn't pass out it wasnt really a seizure. So now I don't know what it is.
I REALLY dont want to tell my neurologist. If he puts in my paperwork that Im passing out and having seizures DMV will take my license and I will be stuck with a car I cant drive but still have to make payments on plus no more convenient transportation. I guess the good news is I know my e-stim wasnt triggering it so I can go back to exercising. The bad news is I just got a bill from the company asking for $750 so if my dad's insurance does not cover it, I will have to send the e-stim unit back and I've yet to find an OT in my dad's insurance network that can help me exercise so there goes my progress. sorry I am rambling. I guess I will call my doctor again and see if any irregular results came back from my blood work since they never called me.