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Letting go of "waiting to live till recovered" idea


SandyCaregiver

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I can't remember if I mentioned this or not... we decided to cut back to one day of therapy a week. After some careful consideration, we realized that our whole lives were about doctors and therapy, and that left no time for real living. I'll have to add that I have fibro and he is only awake 8 hours a day, divided by a nap! What if he dies this year...or me? and we had never taken time for doing things again? We needed to start actually living, rather than being like the fat person that is waiting to lose weight to do things - don't want to be the same mindset, waiting to 'be recovered' before making room for our lives together. Of course, besides the one day of out therapy, we work on things at home.

 

So, we have been having little outings and it gives me more time to do chores without feeling soooo raggedy. The boxes and furniture have been crammed in since the house sold in July, and toward the end of Sept, I actually started working on all the boxes and misplaced furniture that was brought here after the move.

 

I also had to consider that I had only seen my mom twice since his stroke, as we were always exhausted from our appointments. An 85 yr old mom, whose had a stroke, a heart attack and has a pace maker, won't last forever, I knew I couldn't keep putting her off, and never getting to her. I will post more in my next blog about our doings.

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Good for you both!! Quality outweighs quantity. What is the point of all those therapy and dr sessions if you are not "living" too! and go see Mom...I'll bet she misses you.

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I think what your saying is that life doesn't begin tomorrow. it begins now. its a good thing for me also to keep in mind. thank you!

 

david

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Yes, those therapies do tend to take over our days. If Larry goes to therapy, he is done for the rest of the day. We too are taking a break, be it Medicare imposed, but have had therapies now for 3 1/2 years. We have to have a life!

 

Julie

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Sandy: you have always been proactive with Bob, at home, since he got back home. You never ceased to amaze with the amount of exercise you both do every day.

 

We too are on a break - Medicare imposed, and this time Bruce was actually disappointed. I will have to keep that in mind for the next round and maybe be a bit more aggressive in how much he is allowed.

 

But for now, yes, just enjoying our beautiful fall and getting some work done here in the house.

 

Do keep us posted and let us know how your visit with Mom went. Debbie

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Sandy :

 

once you start living your normal life after all therapies are done then real emotional & physical healing starts. encourage bob to do more for himself & in the house. more he will contribute in family dynamics better he will feel above his life. invest in treadmill & stationary bike & make him do all exercises at home & make those part of his routine. once you start living you realize there is life after stroke too and that too good one.

 

Asha

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Hello Sandy, yes life is short, and we need to live it. Do go see your Mom. The best thing I did is get on a plane and spend time with my Parents. I have so many memories, and it brings a joy to my heart, when I sit down and think about my trip.

All the best, do blog about the visit.

 

Yvonne

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well that didn't take long, just got home from emergency room. Mom started having problems when I was on the phone with her and I met the lifesquad at the hospital. She looked good when I finally left.... so one more dodging the bullet for her.

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Yea, we only live once and there isn't much we have time to "Put off" for another day it's just not promised to us!

 

Even going to therapy sessions. I was scheduled today and my car wouldn't start. Had to go get another battery, it was fully covered, so no cost to me this time. Now I got one good for five years!!

 

We try to live each day together as if it's our last, you just never know when God will call !!

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Live each day to the fullest for none of us are promised tomorrow! How well we know that huh? We do have to help them recover but living life is part of recovery! Make the best of it, it will serve you both well! Glad your mom is ok.

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