Ok. So as some of you know after stroke , you may have had some OCD tendencies. Well, I have and boy is it a pain. as some of you know relationships and marriage a part of that is closeness. Well tonight while doing the dinner dishes my husband wanted to give me a kiss. Before the stroke,not a big deal to have a distraction but this time it wasn't as easy as that. I get a physical pain when I have to stop what I'm doing. A chest pain. A stomach ache. I know I must be hypocritical to him because I want him close to me and when he does sometimes I push him away to do something that is important to me at that time. It's hard not to say,'don't take it personal'. For the longest time the stroke was something I had to deal with. I think it was because it's hard to understand something that you don't know a lot about on top of not showing 'stroke'. It struck me today while baking cookies ( i was in a mood) and listening to 'This American Life' on NPR radio and they were talking about the vets coming home and dealing with PTSD.((Post traumatic Stress Disorder)) I was diagnosed with PTSD after my abusive relationship with my ex husband and I was after my stroke. The show was about how the vets get such a bad wrap for going through so many emotions after service. I realized my OCD and PTSD have some of the same symptoms.

• You may not have positive or loving feelings toward other people and may stay away from relationships.
  
• Suddenly become angry or irritable.
  
• Have a hard time sleeping.
  
• Have trouble concentrating.
  
• Fear for your safety and always feel on guard.
  
• Be very startled when someone surprises you
  
• OCD
  
• Obsessive thoughts
  
  • Fear of dirt or germs or overconcern about body smells/secretions or the proper functioning of the body
    
  • Overconcern with order, neatness, and exactness
    
  • Fear of thinking bad thoughts or doing something embarrassing
    
  • Constantly thinking of certain sounds, words, or numbers, or a preoccupation with counting or checking
    
  • Constant need for approval or the need to apologize
    
  • Fear that something terrible will happen or fear of harming yourself or someone else
    

They're not cut an dry a like but some of the same feeling are the same. I do meditate, acupuncture and they help. I've tried to explain my thought process but its hard