Nancy, you took some time off and the world didn't end, so it will be easier to do it again next time you need to. One step at a time. You did it and that was the important step you needed to take. I can imagine how exhausted everyone was. I left Ray with my older son just once and he never volunteered to have him again. The younger one as you can read in my blogs was much better at managing Ray.  But both saw that that happy smiling figure in the nice blue shirt was an illusion, the real Ray was somewhat different and much harder to handle.

Glad you did the trip and made the discoveries you did.  Family time will count further down the track but at the normal level rather than special events.  You went, you saw, you wondered...lol.

Nancy: so glad you enjoyed your trip and your detour. How lucky was that? Loved the pictures. Home again, home again - jiggity jig. Debbie

Nancy, glad to see you were able to have your trip and stay the whole time.   I don't know if it will be easier to get back in step, now that you are refreshed, or harder, because you've had a chance to have a normal week.   I'll just send you my prayers and hope that it made you stronger and Dan will be appreciative to have you back home.  

Debbie, what pictures?

I just realized how much I block the thought of going somewhere without Ray out of my mind.  Sounds like a fairy tale to me;  I'd like to be queen for a day (or a whole week!) sometime.  My trip to Wyoming would have been so different on my own, oh well, water under the bridge. 

And yes I'm going to blog about it, after my "company" this afternoon:  "Aunt" Jennette, my Mom's oldest friend who was caregiver to her husband for many years after they moved to Arizona, and had a real emotional time of it.  She is always mentioning to me that she knows how hard caregiving is, just like everybody does, but I realize she is one of the few who is actually telling the truth.  I used to hear from Mom how she'd get all these tearful calls and why was she so upset, oh she must be having a nervous breakdown.  Sad, but she probably says the same thing about me to everyone now. 

Anyway glad the trip worked out after all your anticipation, at least as well as could be expected  ;-)  You're a lot braver than I am!  On to the next adventure.......

I can truthfully see a partial move in our future to AZ -- so much nicer than ND in terms of temp. and plain out things to do…. we really have nothing here, the kids and my Weston and the grandkids from MN … but in reality outside of Summer I won't see the family from MN all that much and Weston is growing up. I kinda feel this will be the last winter. Next year Weston will be in Preschool and will need his grandma much less. and I think I might have better abilities to find caregivers in AZ. Our pool of caregivers is so small that I must accept much less in terms of my expectation. I like the gal I have, but she to will move on at some point in time. I mean it is not like I pay what she could earn elsewhere in terms of pay and benefits… So she is roosting for a while , but will move on… Because that is life…nancyl

the pictures are Facebook - pics i can never load pics on here so i gave up… if you are a Facebooker -- PM me and I will give you my Facebook name and you can friend me...

hey nancy, people who are not caregivers (and I am not) have so little idea of what that really means. and so thank you for sharing!

david

So glad you made it there and had a good "me time".  I don't know how you do it but congratulations!

Hope Dan is doing better.

Julie

I am so tired of the pit in my stomach feeling… i just can't shake it… dans moods change on a dime and i can't stand leaving him home and i can't stand taking him somewhere, he has a tantrum and boom time to go… the physical work? no problem the moods, changing so quick --- BIG problem…how does anyone survive this….. one day at a time, one hour at a time, one minute at a time one second at a time…. always waiting for the next shift….of the wind , and the mood with it...

Nancy: I do hope Dan's medical team and your friend are still looking for short term placement in a hospital. Dan will be in a safe environment where the pros can witness exactly what you are describing.

In the meantime, you still have the Neuro-Psych appointment. Just praying that some light may be shed on this soonest. Debbie