Stroke is a thief. It robbed me of my life,my dreams,my goals,people in my life,my job,my home,my abilities. It threatens my hope,my joy,my life,my future. I do not get to do things I want to, which brings sadness and disappointment. Yes I recovered some things,and lucky I retained some things,I am grateful for life,But the recovery is not saving anything. This isnt a life anyone would settle for. I must work hard and hope more. I no longer cry. The pill numbs
And yet they keep saying in time,more time, so when will i be labeled disabled, when will I get some real assistance. No one checks on my spirit. Thankfully I can escape to a dr appt. But I can never wake from this nightmare in this life. Please let me mourn. I had a good life. I had to give it all away,but I am alive and aware but in a foreign body,foreign perceptions,daily pain. I am tired of waiting for change..I wish to have fun. I advocate more than the person assigned here. I have a broken spirit that wants to heal soar. I need purpose,so I change nail polish,play bingo. I pray again. I am inspired by others,but it hurts that it is not my story too, but then I am ashamed because of the abilities I do have. Who can I vent cry with? It requires so much fight to get through. I dream so much. I am finally getting treatment for some things so I am happy. This is familiar now. I struggle to accept God's will that I live like this,will never celebrate achievements,dreams,but watch while others live my dream. Can I endure,what is before me,dare to hope. Of course. It is what we do. Play those blues,sing my heart out. Acceptance and peace I seek.