I met with the Ombudsman this morning. She had received a report but apparently not my side of the story. She asked why did they want me to move. I said because those men always sat at the two tables put together by the fireplace. But they told not asked me to move even after they put 2 other tables together and they sat at them. The director said one man in big wheelchair needed 2 tables together and my reply was that was not the only place for 2 tables.

I know bottom line was I could not be wheeled wway or silenced. I told ombudsman I was humiliated in front of a full dining room,They took away my dining companions. They served the men food while I was told to move by kitchen staff and cnas.

I said I felt that they want to drive me out. I do not feel safe,respected,cared for. I fear retaliation in those cant catch it ways.

I feel others think I am over reacting. Why didnt I just move to a nice window seat is what director said. And I wanted it reported which they acted like it was petty.

I said I must report this. And I begged for help finding a different place more suitable. Ombudsman said I may help prevent it from happening to another. I said I was traumatized by the events, no one supported me at the time, and directors made excuses not apologies. I want to report this to the state licensing to investigate. Even if the result is more excuses.

I do not go out of my room. I am upset when one of the people from that scene come near me. I tell them to get away firmly. None apologize. I miss the new friends I made here. It is nice they have visited but it is not the same as support. They want me to be ok. 3 staff people came to tell me bingo now. I say not today. Why the sudden notice and pressure to play bingo from staff.

I do not think I can be at home here. How dare staff involved now come to me saying bingo time. They spoil bingo for me. They betrayed me. That is how I see it.

I reported it to cleanse my soul of the anger and sadness. I have no expectations that anything will change. A report may not be a big deal. I may look crazy. But silence will violate me again and make me feel more helplessly insignificant.

I want to forgive but I believe we teach people how to treat us.

I do not know why it turned so ugly over a table. I dared to refuse. Now I am a nuisance. They want to report that all is well. For me it will not be while I am here.

I had one kind nurse that listened to me sob. She saw me talk to ombudsman and says she gets it. I gotta do something. Not pretend it was nothing. I feel better with one person support,approve,gets it.

I even feel better now reporting,telling story.