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To be really Jolly or not as Jolly that is the Question...



Its been about 3 weeks since my hysterectomy and I am feeling better and better. This time of year is hard for me though both before and after the stroke. 1st it's never been the same since my divorce and 2nd I had my first super set back just a couple of weeks before Christmas when I had a mega panic attack and had psychogenic stuttering constant for 1 and half months last year. This year it's all about the finances...barely making ends meet is hard during a holiday. Well I have decided I have to get myself out of this funk. The times I feel best are when I do things for me. So it's going to be Tracy time. I haven't worked out all the details yet but the first thing I'm going to do is make a Christmas wreath. I had so much fun making my fall wreath that I have decided to make this something I do as the year passes through seasons and holidays. I feel proud of it. I am also trying to get my speech therapy to happen again as my Neuropsychologist suggested. I really felt like I was improving so much while doing that I'm looking forward to it. I will be sure to see my family this year cause I love that as well. I didn't get to last year because of my setback. It was my choice but if something happens this year I think I'm making the choice of seeing everyone anyway. I feel like it will be better for me. I think I'm going to make some doable Christmas resolutions and enjoy the feeling I get when checking them off instead of New Years Resolutions that many times I don't accomplish. That is definitely pressure I do not need. Get an apple pie candle. Make some Christmas cookies. Put my wall tree up earlier. I have been putting a wall tree up for the past 2 years because my house is so small that I'm unable to put even a narrow tree up. But I like this wall tree. I decorate with new and different colors and it goes up in like 10-15 minutes lights and all....and comes down even quicker. I think Ill put out window wreaths this year. I'm going to make a list. Feeling better already. Take away so much pressure. What are your ideas?


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Tracy, you are a great list maker and I know if you put something on your list you try to tick it off so be bountiful with your ideas and then if you do 50% of them you will still make a great job of it.  I love to make some of the ornaments myself, always go to the charity shops for extras in the colors I have chosen and for next to nothing there I am with a great display.  I love your energy.  You are a great person just by yourself young lady.  I know the depression gets to us all sometimes (mine is about being alone too) but somehow we struggle past it and go on with life.  Hurray for us!!!

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Tracy, you are correct,  be Jolly, and get   your wall tree up. Also made cookies, save some for me please.  I love sending Christmas cards, I  love thinking how the person will be smiling as they receiver their card. Target, they have wonderful art projects that do not cost too much, and are fun to do. yes they say they are for kids, but they are fun for adults to do.  Also coloring books for adults, are great to do, again not to expensive.  I am also going to bake, and giving it to neighbors,  a great way to get to know them..


Take care Tracy



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Jolliest Jolly best no matter what. no pressure now. we did hallmark already.

now pamper yourself. sit in a big cozy sweater washed in fabric softener.


yes create create.

you are here. be seen.

you are beautiful.

watch the holidays this time as you participate in them. enjoyment is jolly. yes be with others. you deserve tolove and be loved.

you can.

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Tracy :


you have great ideas do them happiness is a choice. you are still here for a reason & not as punishment so enjoy holidays & be fun person to b around.


have blessed holidays



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Give yourself some me time it's been three weeks so you can start to think sex time and you'll be amazed how your spirit has changed to brighter times in your life..... That's just the way life goes!!!!

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I have made my list but I am going to have to refer to this blog post for motivation. It's this low and I don't like it. I think because it gets dark so early now and it's cold and wet. Tracy this is for you. 

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