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I know my problems are nothing compared to what others are going through


HostAsha

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I do have love hate relationship with my husband, in some things he is angel &  I love him for his behavior & in some cases he will act so indifferently that you wonder does he really likes to be with you or not. like I say he is great dad & husband in taking care of his responsibilities, you feel relaxed because you know he will make sure things gets done. but ask him anything I would like to do like go on some fancy vacation or going to restaurant, he will be least interested & you wonder whether he likes to spend time with you or not. but he does not stop me from planning it, but he is least interested in showing any enthusiasm for it. So I  feel I m dragging him & that reduces my joy, though after every time we go on vacation together because of my nature of going with flow we end up having lot of fun. So I hate that part of him, anything I want to do his first instinct will be to say no & then he will come around saying yes which reduces my joy. finally after my stroke I have learnt only I can control my happiness & not give any button of my happiness in other people's hands. But I hate that feeling as if you are living unattached single person, cause I would like to feel as family who takes care of each other joys & sorrows. Just writing down my own thoughts & confusion about life, love & family

 

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:hug:I can understand how that would wear you down over time. I don't have any advice I 'm single. But wanted to say "I hear you"

-Heather

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"Marriage is made in heaven but has to be lived out on earth" is an old saying Asha. We come together in marriage as human beings with faults. My Ray was not a great one for saying "I love you" but thought he expressed that in all he did for our family. I desperately wanted him to say the words but in the end decided that this was not his way. We lived in relative contentment for 44 years. I miss him so much still.

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Sue:

 

I have same issues with my husband, I know he loves me dearly  & shows his love through his actions, of-course not all actions shows that, but that applies to me as well none of us are perfect human being, We all can do our best & need to accept each other the way we are instead of trying to change one another. So from time to time my discontent shows up, I just wanted to write it  & get some wisdom that this is all normal & get over with it.

 

Thanks for thoughtful comment, it helps me settle down

 

Asha

 

 

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Asha, 

I understand your feelings. I go that way sometimes and felt similar ways with Rob.  My therapist told me that he would not be with you if he didn't want to. what if you went to him and gave him a kiss or kinda being romantic, maybe he's waiting on you to make the move 

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