OK, THE MUCK IS GETTING THICK, SO I'M THROWING AN EXTRA STRONG LIFELINE. BUT DON'T READ THIS BECAUSE YOUR IN THE 1%. I'M IN THE OTHER 99%, SO I'M GOING TO WRITE THIS ANYHOW.

I'VE BEEN DEPRESSED, AND IT SUCKS. SO I LISTED THE POSITIVES IN MY LIFE, AND CONCENTRATED ON THOSE THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY, OR GIVE ME SATISFACTION NOW. DO YOU THINK I WANTED TO GIVE UP A SUCCESSFUL BUSINESS THAT I ENJOYED AND GAVE ME A PAYCHECK EVERY WEEK? DO YOU THINK I WANTED TO WALK WITH A LIMP, CAUTIOUS OF MY BALANCE. AND NOT BEING ABLE TO DO THE THINGS AROUND MY HOUSE AS I USED TO.?

I DIDN'T WANT SYMPATHY, SO I'M MAKING THE BEST OF IT. APPARENTLY, THERE'S NO ROOM IN HEAVEN (OR HELL) SO I WAS SPARED FOR A REASON. I KNOW IT SOUNDS EASY TO SAY, BUT YOU ARE A VALUABLE PERSON, WITH LOTS OF PEOPLE ON THIS SITE WHO CARE. PLEASE DON'T THROW IN THE TOWEL. THERE'S SO MUCH TO LIFE OUT THERE TO CHERISH.

MARTY

well here is another life line.........................................

It is very hard to adjust to all the changes going on. Are you getting enough sleep,

when I am overtired it makes everything 10 times harder.

I try to do domething positive for myself every day, whether it is to go outside and sit on the porch with my mornng coffee and watch the birds and butterflies, or having a cookie and a glass of milk

I wrote a list of 10 things I am thankful for.

have you spoken with your doctor, maybe you need a change in medication.

you have friends here and sometimes just reading the posts and blogs can make you smile or even see there are other people with similar or worse problems.

sure hope you wake up and have a better day... Bonnie

ok im going to toss u a life line here to bu dd===========================================

i was in same boat as u for along time as well i know how that depression monster really suks i tried all the meds to nothing seemed to work untill i made myself make soome changes like getting out of the house go do something friend those 4 walls r ur enemyit seems the longer u stay in the closer those walls get i know it sounds hard butt u have to try ok dont give up for giving up is not an option here

u must try try try i know u r trying and dat bed seems so fantatic but the more u lay there the more weaker u get if u can walk at least go outside and sit in chair outside or somin u r not a quiter so get up lil soldier

Hi Clarke

Long time no talk ol buddy. Sorry that you are feeling a bit down today.

Hay man I just read an encouraging post on the board that was posted a while ago by a very good friend of mine and I thought I would like to share it with you eh.

Here it is:

very thankful to be alive and see the sun set one more time. It did put things in persprctive for me something I don't think I could have done for myself. I saw people who were buried with enormous physical and mental problems, struggling to recover. Boy did I ever feel humble. I think most people on this site would like to live as long as they can with the best possible quality to life they can have, not an was task but this is a pretty special group of individuals strong, brave and caring and I know they would just as soon spite in the devils eye before they had to give up a single hour of their lives. Truly role models if there ever were any. I'll never forget that dark day in November 2003 when I stumbled onto this site and starting my own road to recovery and acceptance. An accident I don't think so, coincidence? luck? no now of those. I was meant to find you exceptional folks. So I guess what I'm saying is live long live good and enjoy every day you have. When The time comes we'll all get the call until then take care and enjoy.

Nice post eh and it had over 2000 views.

So keep your chin up and your back to the wind cus we all need each other here at strokenet.

Enjoy the sunset.....everyday

Big smiles Clarke

Your strokebuddy

Gary

I'm sorry that you are so depressed. I've been in that dark pit a few times myself lately and it's hard to climb back out. I sometimes have difficulty having to be the positive one through Gary's depression from his stroke, because it's not easy for me either. When he gets down I have to moon him to get him to laugh. Do you have someone who could do that to get you laughing? If not, could you use the mirror and moon yourself ---would it be worth a laugh to try?

I think I learned a long time ago, probably as a child, that life can hand you alot of crap and you have to learn to either sink or swim in it. Many times in my lifetime I've been swimming in it up to my ears and I still manage to tread if I'm too tired to swim. All of us at the stroke network are here to help each other; and if you can't swim, you ask for help. As you have seen, there are always friends to throw out that lifeline.

Stay afloat so that you, too, can be there when someone needs your lifeline. Nobody should be going through this alone!

Sarah

clark,

i don't ever remember you mentioning if any doctor has ever tested your thyroid????? if not it couldn't hurt to try, ya know. at any rate, depression sucks major big time and i wish i could take away your pain. i will be thinkling about you clark.

kim

HERE IS MY FAVORITE INSPIRATION AND ESPECIALLY SINCE I STROKED:

DREAM AS IF YOU ARE GOING TO LIVE FOREVER

LIVE AS IF YOUR GOING TO DIE TOMORROW

Hi Clarke:

I don't know what to say buddy. I really don't understand how depression can 'destroy' someone's willingness to 'fight' and 'defeat' this ugly, horrible thing called stroke. But, I do understand one thing, and that is that you have the 'entire StrokeNet Family' behind you, encouraging you, and willing to help you 'fight' this ugly 'creature'.

As others before me, and I'm sure there will be other 'responders and encouragers' behind me, we are in this 'fight together. I would 'invite' you to go to Inspirational Thoughts, on the main Message board and read "How Do you handle adversities"? I think if you would 'takle the place' of that mule, and 'shake off' every little problem, you might feel better.

And as others have suggested, getting out of the house, maybe volunteering somewhere, getting together for coffee with friends, might give you some encouragement too.

I will keep you in my prayers. Keep your chin up, face each day with a smile, and thank God that he has allowed you another day to 'appreciate' His Handiwork.

Denny

hi

hi sorry to hear that you are so depressed I know it's not funny to want to give up... you must find something to take your mind off how blue you feel try and find a hobby that you used to enjoy and see if it will help... you seem to be able to write well why not start a book about stroke and reverse the problems so they include humour something like Erma Bombeck... I'll keep you in my prayers and hope that you can see some better days....