My husband works a 40 hr/wk job that often requires more hours. Plus he's my caregiver, though I'm pretty much self contained these days. I dress/feed and even drive myself. Our son is living at home as is his girlfriend...see old blog entry about daughter to whom I never gave birth. All he asks is for the house to be picked up when he comes home from work. This chore doesn't fall on my shoulders only...son and girlfriend are obligated, too.

The last two days, the dishes weren't done so my martre husband washed them himself and wouldn't accept my help or offer to do it instead.

Now mind you, the dished don't need to be done every day. But somedays those dishes seem to reproduce themselves while waiting to be washed. I don't feel the need to wash the dishes when there is only a bowl and a couple spoons to be done. Since I'm not the one using the bowls and/or spoons I'm not aware of the pile-up occuring.

So, what's the problem? I feel guilty for not washing the dishes and hubby does them after putting in a 9 hour day of work. Especially, since I don't do anything else of productivity at this house. If it weren't for the dissability insurance, I feel I am only dead weight to my husband.

Son and girlfriend are another story. Both tend to have an entitlement attitude about themselves...that they are too good for any real work. Son is greatly improved in this area...he is pitching in and doing things like mowing and cleaning the house. NO, we don't mow the house.

Anyway, I'm experiencing a mixed bag of emotions and am trying to not slide into the abyss of depression about not being useful and worthless and a burden.