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TURD TALK


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EVERYONE WHO KNOWS ME KNOWS I'M A STRANGE PERSON DRAWN TO THE BIZARRE AND UNUSUAL. biggrin.gif I CAN'T BLAME THAT ON THE STROKE!!!!! LOL. YESTERDAY WAS NO EXCEPTION. I HAVE BEEN FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO BECOME CLOSE FRIENDS WITH MICHAEL( GREYHE/HOSTMICHAEL) WHO RIVALS ME IN THE "WEIRD" CATEGORY. bouncesmile.gif IN FACT, WE ARE IDENTICAL TWINS WITH THE ONLY DIFFERENCE BEING GENDER AND TIME!!!!! giggle.gif

 

 

SO, WHEN ONE OF MY "STRANGE" THOUGHTS POPPED INTO MY HEAD TODAY, MICHAEL WAS THE FIRST( AND ONLY) LOL, PERSON WITH WHOM I COULD SHARE. I CLICKED ON YAHOO MESSNGER AND SAID, "MICHAEL U THERE?". HE CAME BACK, YUP, IN BETWEEN JOBS". I SAID "MICHAEL, I HAVE A QUESTION". HE GOES "OK, SHOOT". I SAID " HOW MANY TIMES A DAY DO YOU TAKE A DUMP AND WHAT ARE YOUR STOOLS LIKE?". lol_2.gif

 

 

THIS CONVERSATION LASTED ABOUT 30 MINUTES, STRICTLY "TURD TALK". I WAS SERIOUSLY LAUGHING SO HARD THAT I LITERALLY CRIED!!!!! lol_2.gif

I WON'T REVEAL HIS "BOWEL SITUATION". LOL, HE CAN BLOG IT LATER IF HE SO CHOOSES. I CAN HOWEVER, TELL A LITTLE STORY OF MY OWN.

 

I AM AND ALWAYS HAVE BEEN CONSTIPATED OR THE OPPOSITE. I KNOW, TMI!!!!! giggle.gif BUT, ( NO PUN INTENDED) I THINK THIS STEMS FROM STRESS AND NERVOUS ENERGY. THE WORST THING I CAN THINK OF IS CONSTIPATION. IT IS MORE HORRIBLE THAN A TOOTHACHE. JANICE BLOGGED ABOUT A SIMILAR TOPIC ONCE, AND IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY, I COMMENTED" HAVING A GOOD BM GIVES ME A WARM FUZZY FEELING" lol_2.gif

 

 

MY WORST EXPERIENCE I REMEMBER IS BEING ON A "VACATION" WITH MY SOON TO BE EX-HUSBAND WHO MADE ME TENSE AND A NERVOUS WRECK WITH HIS SCHEDULES AND LISTS, AND A TEMPORARY ROOT CANAL FILLING CAME OUT AND CAUSED SEVERE PAIN. HENCE, I COULDN'T EAT FOR FIVE DAYS AND WHEN I FINALLY FOUND A DENTIST TO FIX THE TOOTH, I WAS STARVING TO DEATH AND ATE LIKE A PIG. ********BIG MISTAKE************

 

SO, I WAS CONSTIPATED FOR 8 MISERABLE DAYS AND NOTHING OVER THE COUNTER WORKED. JUST WHEN I WAS AT THE POINT I WAS GOING TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM, OR GOING TO BUY SOME RUBBER GLOVES, laugh.gif ........eureka!!!!!!!!!!!! IT WAS ONE OF THE HAPPIEST DAYS OF MY LIFE!!!!!! I'LL NEVER FORGET THE JOY. roflmao.gifroflmao.gifroflmao.gif

 

 

AFTER SWAPPING THESE AND OTHER BOWEL MOVEMENT STORIES WITH MICHAEL, I WAS HAPPY TO KNOW THAT I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN'T "DO IT" WITH ANYONE PRESENT, AND I WASN'T THE ONLY ONE WHO HATED PUBLIC RESTROOMS!!!!!!!! roflmao.gif AFTER I GOT THROUGH LAUGHING, MY DAY WAS BETTTER AND MY HEART LIGHTER!!!!!! pash.gifpash.gifpash.gif

 

 

SOMETIMES, "TURD TALK" CAN BE VERY THERA "PEW" TIC!!!!!!!!

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That's right eveyone, I spend time chatting on IM with Kim about our BMs.

 

Now, if you'll excuse me.... the bathroom is calling my name. Time to do some paperwork.

 

Michael

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Kim,

 

I guess that goes to show you there is one truth to life. I learned it early in my employment career.

 

"No job is truly complete until the 'paper'work is done" roflmao.gifroflmao.gifroflmao.gif

 

Sorry, I couldn't resist that one.

 

Charles

 

 

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dats right charles! no job is complete without the paperwerk roflmao.gif

my lawd kim i new u were a lil strange but i jus chalked it up to u being a alabama inbreeding gurl u been on dat atump one to many times my friend!!! roflmao.gif

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Kim, actually constipation is better than the opposite. Nerves really set me going, and little did I know that 13 years ago when I thought "great, I'm eating and the food isn't sticking around, I'll loose weight" I never realized that I was loosing potassium. After 6 months of this, I had my first stroke and when I was in the ER (thought feeling on face was from a bee sting) they kept asking me if I was on a diuretic, taking diet pills etc. They rechecked my blood and asked again. It was about 2 years later that I read that you can also loose potassium this way also. A potassium deficiency is no good.

 

Unfortunately, I also have had problems like yours. IAfter that stroke, I was unable to cry. I lost my dog and a good cry would have helped but in stead I kept all my emotions in and I became plugged big time. Rather than wait getting a new dog, it became necessary to do it at once. I did have to wait until the puppy was old enough to leave her mother, so I felt that a proper grieving time was met.

 

So, I've seen both sides of the coin. Can't realy decide which is worse.

 

Anyway, thanks for a good laugh. I love the idea that you and Michael were able to IM roflmao.gifroflmao.gifroflmao.gif

 

Note to Stan: She sure is a nutty southern broad, huh? (I do "love" you, Kim. you're my kind of people)

 

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GEEZ KIM, WHAT A "CRAPPY" RELATIONSHIP YOU AND MICHAEL HAVE? WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY, A PLUNGER?

 

MARTY bouncesmile.gif

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You may want to discuss this with your doctor...could be irritable bowel syndrome and there is medication to help.

I'll chip in with Marty for the B day present...or a box of all bran

Bonnie biggrin.gifroflmao.gif

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Sorry, I can't help but respond...

Neither situation is desirable. Get blocked up and you cause a multitude of bad results. And the little d, as I put it...diarhhea, is no picnic.

Marty is right...seek out an internist and have a colonscopy.

BTW Milk of Magnesia can solve the blockage but the last time I resorted to using MOM I felt nasty like I had the little d.

There is the chewable fiber things and the new stuff that isn't like eating sand(gritty).

A stool softener can help the situation.

 

Isn't it grand getting old and discussing our BMs ? Just the kind of stuff we hated to hear about when we were kids, huh?

 

Hope everything comes out ok in the end. PUN intended. waycon1.gif

 

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I'm going to ask a rather sh..t question.. first of all we experienced a very bad time about three years ago where our water got contaminated. I got deathly sick .. I couldn't hold any thing in my stomach and had the runs constantly lost 10 pounds and was very weak.... I could not get to the toilet which is an ensuite I was so weak... must have lost a lot of potassium and other minerals... dr. said he was unable to find any thing in my blood... question..... does any have any idea why a stool is so large after a stroke since my hubby had his stroke he has a hard time to pass his stool and it is so large that it sometimes plugs the toilet..he is taking a stool softener twice a day... any suggestions???// really like an answer.....

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When I saw the neurologist she asked about constipation or bathroom problems. Apparently there can be problems with a part of the brain that can control functions. It could be from not walking and getting the exercise you used to get. I would definately speak with the doctor.

could be some neurologicla dsyfuntion. Also for stool softeners to work properly they should be taken with a large glass of water.

Bonnie

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