since buford's out of town for awhile, i have had some time to do some soul seraching and i have decided to change my identity. while i was sitting around trying to decide on my new identity, it occurred to me that what i REALLY wanted to be was all around me, QUITE literally. at my head, feet, on my lap, CATS!!!! cats everywhere, that's what i want to be, A CAT!!!!!!!

so, i went down to the court house and legally changed my name to katharine dee katz ( KAT D. KATZ). i was SHOCKED at how easy it was. when the judge asked me for my reason for the name change and i said" i want to become a cat", he didn't even blink an eye!!! anyway, the process continues.

LIVING like a cat

i went to walmart and bought a 3x2 ft storage box and filled it up with 14 boxes of kitty litter. while i haven't actually USED it yet, i have scratched around in it. i bought myself some large feed bowls and for the past week have only had tuna, salmon, water, milk, icecream, and cheese. it's not that hard to follow a kitty diet.

LOOKING like a cat

since i have always looked good in black and white, i decided to become a TUXEDO kitty. i had my hair dyed black with white streaks in it. i also went to a tatoo parlor and had my eyes done up like a cat, and had my cheeks pierced so i can put in whiskers. i had my dentist make me some lifelike kitty teeth. thay are removable now, but i'll get permanent later. i had kitty claws put on my nails too.

i saw a cosmetic surgeon about getting a tail implanted, but he won't do it without a psyche evaluation.

BEING a cat

ashley and i bought a huskie leash at a pet store and she has walked me around the neighborhood a few times. i want everyone to KNOW that i'm a friendly kitty. i won't bite or hiss. one little girl even petted me on the head !!! it was so wonderful to be a real kitty!!!!!!

family

well, buford doesn't know about my new identity yet, but if he REALLY loves me, it'll be ok. my parents were a little upset at first, but i think they're coming around. today daddy left me a fresh bowl of milk on my desk.

TALKING like a kitty

this was really easy. meow means "hi, how are ya", meOW, means" ow, you're petting me too hard" and MEE OWWWWW!!! means happy april fools day.

MEE OWWWWW!