babz:

I truly sympthasize with all you caregivers. sometimes we survivors take out our anger on people we love the most, is it possible maybe he is pointing out all your deficiencies to hide his own. maybe pointing out to make you feel you both are still at the same footing. I think it could be selfesteem issue and changing antidepression pills will defintely help. also encourage him to write down his blessings and maybe try to use this board and blogs to journalize his thoughts, I know it helped me immensely during my low ride.

Asha

Babs, I agree with Asha, he is pointing out your deficiencies to hide his own. So maybe handling things differently would help. Our dementia support mentor says to only challenge what is dangerous, so if he puts the coffee in the sugarbowl instead of his cup let him drink it! He has us laughing with his examples.

We use an expression here that fills in when someone is critising you we say: "you think so?" it doesn't mean you are agreeing or arguing, just acknowledging what the person said, so then you walk off. Let as much as you can go by, arguments are energy sapping so it is harder to work and worry, easier to just get on with daily living.

The changes in personality are often bewildering both to the surviver and the caregiver so I guess it is hard to come to term with it in someone who otherwise from outward appearances seems so normal. I think it is from the brain being damaged combined with the ageing process.

(((Hugs))) from Sue.