I stuck to my word and Im still accepting things. Today I was so tired carrying about 15-20 pounds of books on my shoulder and walking in boots that were a little too big for my feet for hours all day. I wish I knew exactly how many miles I walk each day so people could understand just how far I walk. Its already tiring to walk far, then to have the weight of books, and the harsh cold in my joints just makes me want to collapse to the ground after each step. but I have accepted that. Instead of coming to my room to cry and wish I didnt walk the way I do, I just took off my shoes and rested and thank God I made it back to my room safely without falling. Then I remind myself it could be worse. The other day I went to the mall with my boyfriend and we seen a couple. The husband looked like he had a stroke because he was using a cane and his arm was bent the way mine used to be and my boyfriend held the door for his wife she was in a wheelchair. I seen 2 other people walking with a cane at the mall, and another lady in a wheelchair downtown. The following day I seen someone on crutches and yesterday I seen a blind man walking around campus. It always makes me feel better to know that Im not alone and although I wish it could be better, I am glad it is not worse. I went to the pain management doctor yesterday and he wants me to start the botox and OT again because I explained to him how my braces dont straighten my wrist anymore. After botox and OT failed the first time, it is hard to have hope that it will make a difference but I am trying to be optimistic.

I know I said I was going to stop stressing so much over school but it really is a lot of work. I have 4 test on Friday in all of my classes. I can use extra time if I need it but my classes are back to back 50 minute classes and I know the test are going to be 50 question each so I am very stressed. but I have been trying my best at everything and still not doing good and not understanding. I am starting to feel like this is one of those semesters everyone gets where it is really extensive and stressful. On the good side, my interview went well. The recruiter was from the Pentagon and he told me that President Obama wants the government to hire 500,000 (i think) people with disabilities for federal jobs and by working with one of his employers I will receive free accomodations (i.e one handed keyboard). So I hope I can get the opportunity to work in Washington D.C, but I also want to study abroad in China this summer, and Im applying for a research position at the #1 criminology school in the nation at the university of maryland. I am very excited to see what this summer has in store for me but for now I have to go back to studying so I hope you all enjoy my positive entry