Tony's Blog

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# 10



This entry will be for today and yesterday.


Yesterday I woke after 2.5 hours feeling bad, went back to sleep and slept 5 more hours. I was happy about that.


Was able to walk with breaks. My father drove me to my counselor apointment. We discussed the depression about things that have changed in my life and losing certain aspects. I think this will be a good topic to pay attention to.


Today I woke several times approximately once an hour. I felt a bit dizzy upon waking and slowly got out of bed.


I pushed myself to take a shower, it was exhausting. I took a nap after the shower.


I was feeling a little better earlier but tonight I have a headache. Also for the last 2 weeks, I have had a pain in my chest/back but I don't know what it is. Today I realized that this seems to be emanating from my middle back, on the left. I suppose I am moving differently since my left side is being retrained in my brain and putting different pressure on my back muscles due to this change. This is only a guess.


I have had 3 meals today and have eaten well, didn't eat any meat. I have had an excellent diet since leaving the hospital. Nothing persuades a person to eat food that doesn't taste good like semi-paralysis a jaunt to the hospital. I have been nudged towards a meditteranean/vegetarian diet by fear.


I got very tired yesterday and today. It's nothing new but I thought I'd mention it. I spend the last 4 hours of my night extremely tired but I dare not sleep until it is time or else I suffer the consequences of the insomnia retaliation, which wakes me in the middle of the night with fear and won't let me go back to sleep for 3-4 hours. I have had this insomnia for several years and is a HUGE stressor.


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I feel for you! I know it is amaizing that you seem to be going though this. But this will pass I'm sure. Hang in there!!



Bruce Schwentker

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I have never had insomnia...But, it sounds likes you are coping with it. I can understand how tired you must feel. Disturbed/interrupted sleep is hard.


The pains are hopefully nothing more than muscles acting up. Try some stretching and of course speak to your MD if they continue to plague you.


I pray that you sleep more peacefully.



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