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Ray's current problems


swilkinson

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I always blog when I have thought about an event and the impact has lessened. It is horrible to start a blog with: Ray might lose his leg. But that was the bottom line of our appointment with the podiatrist yesterday.

 

The podiatrist did a lot of tests; we were with him for an hour and twenty minutes. He started off saying he could lance the diabetic blister on Ray’s left heel and finished up saying he couldn’t. Ray’s circulation is weak in both feet, a result of the diabetes not the strokes. But the strokes have contributed as his mobility is so poor and he doesn’t exercise enough to make a difference.

 

We had an appointment to see the orthoptist, the man who actually makes the AFO (ankle-knee orthoptic or leg brace for those who don’t know). He talked to us and said the situation was bad he kept repeating this until I wanted to scream. I do know poor circulation plus leg ulcers or an infected diabetic blister equals amputation.

 

Then he got the podiatrist to come in and they said they will form a team to oversee Ray’s care and I could see the podiatrist in two weeks time and the orthoptist if I needed to. The podiatrist gave me a dressing to put on the blister if it bursts and said to ring and ask for him rather than just going to Accident and Emergency. We talked briefly about seeing a vascular surgeon if we needed to and it was over for this visit. I was devastated, Ray was unaware of what we had discussed as usual.

 

I know there are some things in life you can’t control but I am in the habit of banging my head against the current brick wall. It is my Irish bravado and my Scottish stubbornness. I can never give up without a fight. It is the only way I can handle things. I emailed Debbie and she sent me a “wait and see “ answer. That is the right thing to do. I need to just let nature take it’s course and things might work out okay.

 

So I am confined to barracks more or less for another six weeks. For Ray that is okay while the sun is shining and he can go out on his verandah in the morning and do his word puzzles. It is me that will miss going out, our plans for the beach and the picnics by the lake etc all out the window now. But whatever will be will be.

 

I have tentatively booked some respite for Ray in February, I figure by then I will be climbing walls. It is only the usual two weeks but by then I might be needing a time in an asylum, if there is still one of those around. I could quite easily go mad with just Ray and me and nowhere to go. All the respite places he goes to are booked up till then and I didn’t want to put him in somewhere he hasn’t previously been.

 

I have been worried about Ray and so haven’t really been paying attention here as much as I usually do. I apologize to anyone whose blog I haven’t commented on, or whose post I have failed to answer in my usual way. I do love you and pray for you but my mind has been trapped here for a while.

 

I have told our three children, I told them of the possibility and the present reality. It is all I can do and then “wait and see”. I will mourn my lost summer when all of this is over

10 Comments


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Sue, First off, you don't ever need to apologize to anyone about not commenting on posts or blogs. We all understand and can empathize with what you're going through.

 

What terrible news for you and Ray. I don't have diabetes to worry about, but I do worry about broken bones and how that would affect Dan and my ability to care for him. Amputation is hard to wrap your head around.

 

You have been such a wonderful support for me, from day one of my new life. You're a strong, caring, loving woman and Ray and your family are very fortunate to have you in their lives. The StrokeNet family are very fortunate to have you in our lives.

 

I wish there was something that I could do to help. Lots of hugs are sent to you. I will keep you and Ray in my prayers.

 

((((((((((hugs hugs hugs hugs))))))))))

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Sue,

I would push for the vascular surgeon to have a look sooner. If he can do anything it should be ASAP. Do you have would care specialist? We have that here and it is like PT, OT. They just do wound care.

 

That is terrible news.

 

Just take care of yourself and Ray.

 

I will keep you in my prayers.

 

Ruth

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No need to apologize Sue. I will keep you and Ray in my thoughts and prayers as well. You have a lot on your plate right now. I don't know what I would do if I had to handle everything you do with Ray, etc. Take care.

 

Julie

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Aww Sue, we often talk about the bumps in the road but you are facing major road construction. My heart goes out to you. It always looks darkest on this side of the problem but be confident that you will make it through because you are strong woman. Breathe deeply and take one step at a time. Pat advice for sure but true none the less.

Ruth

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Sue:

 

wow Sue, another big hurdle to jump, but you will not achieve anything by worrying(easy said then done I understand), but in time like this just pray to God and leave everything in his hands. just pray for strength to go through each day as it comes, I usually pray & bribe God & It helps me that time, though I have seen for my lost phones & things my bribery always works lol for bigger things it's huge mental relief. I will keep you & Ray in my prayers. I know 6 weeks of house arrest sounds terrible right now but will be over soon, just take day at a time.

 

Asha

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Sorry about the current problems. One day at a time and hope for the best, that's all any of us can do. Life's challenges sometimes become to overwhelming to imagine! ((((Hugs))) and prayers coming your way!

 

Sarah

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Sue: I am SO sorry to hear of Ray's recent "problems". This is a case of what else can happen. I agree with Asha - pray and given it to God. Worry won't help you; it will just make you more anxious, upset, etc. I say don't project; nothing has happened yet. God will give you the strength you need when you need it. I will keep you in my prayers. Bless You.

 

Leah

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Hi Sue, Sometimes I wonder what we ever did to earn this, don't you?? Logically, with my spiritual mind I can say "why not" we are just people trudging along, all really the same so it's natural that more or less we will all have pretty much equal challenges in life - regardless of our spiritual life and our dependence and giving of our life to God. But then, sometimes....what in the world have I done to be dealt THIS hand??? I bet that deep down you've been asking the same thing.

 

Really, all we can do is to take this one day at a time. Don't try to read the tea leaves to figure out the future - I hope you know what I mean when I say that. This is the time to be as kind to yourself as possible. If you don't feel like scrubbing the floor...let it go a day.

 

A vascular surgeon was the doctor who did Bill's femoral poplitiel surgery. I think I've mentioned it before - it is like a heart bypass except that it is in the leg. I don't know if, like Bill, Ray is not in a physical condition to withstand anesthesia or not...there are so many issues to consider.

 

Anyway, please know you are sure in my prayers. This is such a difficult time. I hope you will be able to get away for at least a few hours a week. Maybe that will keep you sane until February - hey, this is January and not November!!

 

Love you - Ann

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being a wise guy before i read your blog i was going to say how are things down under in the summer and then i read your blog and found out.wacko.gif glad to see you have some of that irish blood. that stubborness has gotten me a lot further than the doctors thought. i'll continue my prayers and wish you nothing but the best and a little me time.You-Rock.gif as i believe popeye said i've takes all i can and i can't takes no more (or maybe that was me) we're here anytime so know you are loved and prayed for and say hey God this one's (worry) on You.blessings mlp

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I'm praying for you and Ray , God doesn't give us more then we can handle but sometimes He really tested us and you are beening tested. I will be in chat for the next few weeks so come and unload on me as I have big shoulders that you can lean on as I have lean on you. Go to the Dr's and don't leave until all your questions are answered,and DO NOT take No for an answer. Sue YOU ARE STRONGER THEN YOU KNOW I beleive that and so should you. You are in my thoughts and prayers daily Sally

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