living alone

[londa]

I am now 2 1/2 year post stroke. Next week my husband will be moving out. I am not sure how it will be living alone. I am left side affected, no hand use and walk with a stiff leg. I have read others at this site that also are on their own and seem to be doing fine. I am looking forward to challenging myself. I am able to drive but haven't, so far, gone to stores alone. Just wanted to get advise from others that are on their own.

Londa

[bstockman]

Hi Londa I do not live alone, but we live on 5 rural acres, 17 miles from either town. My husband is self employed. My daughter came here every day for a week to help. then during the day I was alone, husband had to fly to Az for a funeral and I was alone the time he was gone. I started driving, but at first only a few blocks at a time, and each time a little farther. I started going to stores alone, by at first going to small stores I knew, and could get out of quickly if I started to feel anxious.

 

I also have a cell phone that I make sure I carry with me outside and have phone #'s on speed dial.

 

At first when I was home alone someone called me a few times a day, just to check on me. Can you set up phone calls from family or friends at various times of the day?

 

Also look around your house for anything that might be a safety hazard, pick up throw rugs that you might easily trip on.

 

I used a shower chair and hooked up a hand held shower to the shower head that made showering and rinsing off much easier.

 

Remember on grocery shopping trips that you will have to get the groceries in the house.. ask the checkers to load the bags light for you, or see if you can set up shopping trips with a family member or friend who is willing to help you.

 

Best wishes to you,

Bonnie

[Budweiser]

I'm going to moved next month to live by my self with Bud. My wife and I can't do this any more. We are still great friends but we can't be together anymore. I've got an apartment in the same bulding as my parents live. I've lived there 25years befoe I got a house. I've got my OT to start helping me for doing stuff like cards laying around for stuff that I don't forget (ie: turn off the oven/lights/feed Bud etc..). My stroke is in my speech area so talking over the phone is hard and I still have short memoey problems. It is going to be abit scary but I feel I can do it. I feel that being along can make you strong inside. We are not along. You need help, just PM me or anyone.

 

Good Luck

 

 

 

Bill

[fking]

Londa,

"I'm not living alone", but I'm also 2 1/2 years post stroke from 15 Jan 04. I drive and take care of most things, business, appointments, bills, clothes, cars, house, cleaning and as I say, about everything as if I was alone.

 

I certainly appreciated my wife for the time she spent taking care of me when I couldn't. So, now I try to give her a break to do things for herself without worry about me.

 

It depends on what at this point you are able to do for your self as Pam and Tom was pointing out. What I'm saying is it can be done and I feel I'm doing it now (living alone) with my wife not having to do for me at this stage of my recovery like she did before I was able to drive, shower, climb stairs or feed myself.

 

I've driven to Houston several times myself, stayed overnight. My car and my scooter lets me go anywhere. I'm left side affected but can use the drive in banking by opening the door. So, you can overcome most of the challenges and still be safe.

 

In my mind living alone is not an obstacle, so evaluate what you can/cannot do yourself and put your mind to it. That's how I did it.

If you need more info, please PM me, I think you can do it alone depending on how much you have recovered in the last two years. :scooter:

[janiem]

I live alone, and have adjusted to the changes gradually. You'll find some of the things that work best for you by the mistakes you make along the way. If you're uncomfortable with the thought of going to the store alone, maybe you could practice by taking someone who is with you but separate. The person could be in the store with you for security in case you have problems, but a distance behind you so that you are doing everything on your own.

 

I'm very cautious about doing certain things, and I think I will always pause before I do them. Safety is primary. I found that I was forgetting to turn off the oven, and I worried about what else I might accidentally leave on. Now if I turn on anything involving heat, I put a bright band on my wrist so that I'm constantly aware of it. When I turn the burner, etc. off, I take off the band. If I'm working with heavy things in the kitchen, I use a kitchen cart to move them around, which prevents dropping or spilling them. I've rearranged things in the kitchen to put them in better locations for my current needs. I had a problem with burning myself at the oven, and now use a grilling mitt rather than a regular oven mitt because they're longer. There are wonderful carts now to move groceries between your car and kitchen. I use a cane now, but use my old walker when I get up during the night. After I fell a couple of times, I realized I need the additional balance help when I'm not as alert. I have a very big calendar that helps me with organization. All reminders go on it, so I don't forget to fill a prescription, go to an appointment, make a call, send a bill, mail a birthday card, etc. Every day I check the calendar when I get up, and again before I go to bed. Because of my own memory problems, the double reminders help me.

 

Janie

[door60]

My 75 year old mother will be living alone too soon. She had her stroke 3 years ago. I will go to see her several times a week. She will have an aid 3 times a week, 3 hours each day. The building she will be moving into has a senior center in the lobby, so with her power chair, she will go down Monday thru Friday to get her lunchtime meals . She will get meals on wheels . I am nervous, she is nervous. But, living with me and my family has been too stressful for all of us. Plus she needs to do this. She is isolated living with us, now she will be with others seniors. I think it will make her more independent. She also suffers from emtire left sided weakness -- hand and foot.

Dorrie

[garydotgray]

Hi Londa

 

Living alone is not that bad I am comming up on three years as of August 1st. My 4th stroke anniversery will be on August 10th .

 

I gave up my car 5 months post stroke and I still havn't gotten a replacement.

 

I live in a seniors complex with 13 apartments all on one level. Outside maintenance is cared for so I don't have to mow grass nor shovel snow.

 

The building is located very close to most everything that I need like doctor and grocery stores. Library etc.

 

I am in a one bedroom unit that is disability equipped. raised toilet, grab bars, door handles and such.

 

I have home care on a weekly basis and a lady that does heavy cleaning once a month. I can do some things like dishes, sweeping, vacuming etc.

 

I use the computer to pay monthly bills and order library books etc.

 

I use a rocker knife and a one handed can opener.

 

I do my own laundry. (the building laundry room is right next door to my apartment)

 

So my living alone life is as normal as I can make it and I have been quite comfortable with the arangement.

 

I wish you the best and hope all goes well for you.

 

Smiles

 

Gary

[D Melton]

Hi Londa-

I live on my own-have a 10 yr old daughter with me- I had a couple of strokes and carotid surgery last June.

 

I have been on my own since early 2001- that's when I separated from my ex and divorce final in 2002.

 

It's different living alone after a stroke- I feel I have to keep in touch with people just in case I'm at home by myself for any length of time. My next door neighbor is a single mom too and she does check in on me if she doesn't see me coming and going from the house as usual.

 

Please feel free to send a PM or email anytime to talk.

 

hope all goes well for you.

 

Dianne :chat:

 

[cindyst]

Hi Londa,

 

I have lived on my own for the past 3 years. I've 2 kids that sometimes help out. Is it easy - no, but you learn from your mistakes! It takes time to sort out bills, groceries, etc. But if you give it a try, it will work.

 

Going to the store again once you try it - you will wonder why you never did it before.

 

It's going to an uphill battle - BUT if we can survive what we have gone through - anything else will be a breeze!!

 

Good luck

[CHIQUITITA]

I live alone. I had my stroke alittle over a year ago and I am left side affected, my greatest problem is spasticity. I cannot walk very good and a couple of months ago I fell in my apartment and ended up in the emergency room with a head concussion. I was able to crawl to the phone and called for help. I cannot stress enough how careful you must be if you live alone. Let your neighbors know that you are post stroke and live alone so that they might check on you from time to time, I know mine do and that helps.

[lorrainelm]

 

Hi Everyone,

Lifeline is available in Canada as well for a monthly cost,but I don't know the cost.

I recommend having someone call several times a day to check on anyone living alone.

If you don't have friends or relatives that could do this on a regular basis,the local community

resource places in Canada have volunteers that will give a friendlty call to check on you daily,or when you like

Also good to chat with people for social aspects. I miss social aspect of working and having working relationships.

Take Care

lorrainelm

 

[lady k]

I sort of live alone, I live in a travel trailer out side of my daughters house, she will occasionally check on me, but I do almost everything for myself, also if you have problems doing laundry most washaterias have a bundle service, you take your dirty clothes in and they charge you by the pound to wash and dry then fold and hang up, I use this since otherwise I have to carry them into my daughters house, hard part is getting up the stairs with them, as I still have to hold on, I just get my laundry basket into car, and the nice girl at the laundromat even comes out and helps carry them in, most days her husband is there since he works right next door, so all I do is get them there, it is not very expensive once you figure soap and all the quarters running the machines, most of the time it is about $20 - $30, once when I took all my blankets , quilts and towels, I did spring cleaning, it was almost $50, but those blankets and such were heavy, I think they all weighed about 40lbs, you will find all sorts of helps once you check around, you will be so glad to get your independence back. although some days I get tired and then I wish I had someone, but am still happy I am not having to wait and fit into someone elses schedule. god bless and good luck. :hug: :dribble:

[glaidice]

Hi Londa,

 

I am 3-1/2 years post stroke. My husband died in January right after we moved into a townhouse with three levels, so I was let to unpack (still doing it), and alone. However, I've found that decorating a new place, planting flowers, making the place my own has been fun. Of course you make adjustments. When I go to get groceries I take my shopping cart. Really, I use it for just about everything - taking out the garbage, etc. It's an adventure living alone but can be a great experience. I drive so I go out most everyday even if it's just to the store. I have a weak left side but use it as much as possible and it has become stronger. You can do it - any questions just ask, I'll be happy to respond. :hug: