thejule1

So happy you and William are safe Ruth. There are so many people affected by storms now. I don't know what I would do if we had to evacuate and take Larry in his condition. Have you heard anything about Fred King lately? I know he lived in Houston also. Take care, Julie

I was just popping in to see how everyone was doing and noticed your blog. So sorry to hear you have been through so much but I'm glad you have the support and are recovering. I can so relate as I have had two skin cancers on my face. One was basil cell which had to have part of my right nasal area removed and then plastic surgery. I also had a melanoma on my chin. It was a small mole that I thought nothing of but the good dermatologist I go to saw the change. You are right to say we caregivers need to take care of ourselves. If I don't, I may end up in the nursing home before Larry! Take care and prayers go out to you, Julie

Nancy so sorry for what you are going through and what you have suffered through. You have done your very best It is in God's hands now. Take care. Julie

I have been thinking of you and William during this devastating time. Please take care. Praying for your safety. Julie Eckelman

I'm ashamed to say I have not been on here for a long time. Larry has had some health issues lately. I was in the hospital overnight for the first time in 30 years due to a blood pressure problem. Luckily my son was able to be here to take care of Larry. Fortunately I was only in the hospital for one night but I need to plan a "what if" should I be unable to take care of him for a longer period next time. You never know what is around the corner. For the second time since the end of 2014 Larry had another battle with aspiration pnuemonia. He was doing well on the feeding tube after we got him on the right formula two years ago. He finally gained weight and was at 183. This last hospitalization knocked the daylights out of him. He was in the hospital for a couple of weeks and then in the short term rehab for another month. Due to all the antibiotics he was taking, he contracted C-Diff. He continued to work hard in therapy which helped. He was able to come home but it took a while before he was able to walk with his cane again. I couldn't get our good physical therapist until 5 days later. He has made good progress and is walking again with his cane and transferring well. He had his 7th stroke anniversary in February. I can tell he has declined some over the years but I am happy I was able to get him back home again. He is looking forward to watching our first Cardinal home game this Sunday. We are lucky that we have not had any snow to speak of so far. Spring is starting early here. My best to all, Julie <

So sad to lose a son so soon. You have a wonderful family support and friends who can help you. I know you will continue to be the best caregiver for Gary. Please take care of yourself. Praying for you and your family, Julie

Sarah both of these were nice memorials to your son and mother. I'm sure you will carry those good memories of both of them forever. It was good you had Kelly to help with Gary. He probably did well considering all the traveling. That massage sounds well deserved for both of you. Take care. Julie

Happy Anniversary Asha! I hope you enjoyed it. I know I get so frustrated when things break down as if we don't have enough to cope with. I would miss the TV too as that is our main entertainment here with the baseball games. lol Take care, Julie

Hi Ruth. Larry would not like going in the water. He is always cold and did not like water therapy when he first had the stroke. It has been so hot here so I do not take him out. He does exercises inside and I still have a helper that comes twice a week. He does exercises with him. He does a few on his own but not much. I admire you for doing your yoga. I just go out and walk when weather permits. We have 90's here all week with near 100 heat index. Take care. Julie

Sarah you express yourself so well in your poems and blogs. I just cannot imagine what you must be going through. My son is about the same age your son was and also enjoys fishing. I could so relate to your loss. There are a few bad apples in every crop but most of all policeman are good and just doing their duty. We had a police officer shot in the back just from stopping a low life for speeding. The policeman was shot in the neck as he was going to checking the guys I.D. Now he is paralyzed from the neck down. Every community around is rallying around him and his family. Go have that cup of coffee and tell the police officers how much you appreciate them. God bless you and Gary. Take care. Julie

Oh Sarah. I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Take care, Julie

Sandy, for some reason I did not see your post before. I have been trying to find jeans with elastic waist for Larry. I use to buy them at Sears but I don't think they carry them anymore. I will look for these next time I got to Walmart.The sandals look good too but I am afraid to try anything different with Larry as he walks around by himself at home. The sandals would be so much cooler but Larry may not be use to them. Have a good summer. Julie

We are in a heat wave here in the St. Louis area. We have had several days of near 100 degree temps. I only go out to run errands and I keep Larry indoors. Larry is doing well and no issues so far. He has an aide that comes a couple days a week and he goes through the exercises, including range of motion with him. The aide does light housekeeping such as vacuuming, which I hate. My son is living with us and is a big help with Larry's care. He has a part time job which hopefully will turn into a full time one. It is an adjustment living with your adult son. We both have been living without each other for over 15 years. I do appreciate having someone to cook or share a meal with, take out the trash and clean the kitty litter, etc. lol Larry and I had our 23rd wedding anniversary on the 12th. We did not do much but Larry wanted to get me some flowers so I had my son go pick some up. We cannot go out to eat as Larry is on a feeding tube. He has gained 23 pounds since he left the SNF on February 2015. So, he is doing well on it. He does not have an appetite and it is easier feeding him the formula as I do not have to watch for choking or making sure he is getting the right amount of calories and nutrients. The downside is the social aspect as all of the family get togethers include food. He does not seem to mind this. His birthday is the 24th and the kids are coming over this weekend on Father's Day. There is another event the weekend of his birthday so we agreed to get together this Sunday. We are invited to an outdoor wedding party on the 25th but we will see how hot it gets. I have several friends who are either hospitalized or in a SNF, so I consider myself and Larry to be lucky that we are home with no big health issues. We take Larry out, weather permitting, for trips to the Missouri Botanical Gardens, zoo, or to our kids homes for birthday celebrations. Larry just enjoys watching his favorite TV programs or the Cardinals baseball games. I hope everyone has a good summer. Best wishes to all our survivors and caregivers. Julie

Wow Sarah you have been through a lot with Gary! It is 6 years for us and I have had my caregiving woes as well. If not for us caregivers where would our spouses be? And yes, doctors do not know everything and some do not care as much either. Hope you got your pool time in. Best wishes to you both. Julie

Bruce is making a tremendous progress. I can't get Larry to read anymore but am hopeful. He had read each day after his nap but gave it up a year or so ago. I did notice, as you have with Bruce, that Larry is being more talkative, more aware of things, and questioning more. At least we are going forward in some areas! As I have stated many times before, Bruce is so lucky to have you. Julie

It sounds like you are keeping busy Ruth. The colonoscopy prep is the same one I took the last time. It seemed to be easier. Hope you can retire. You will have enough to do with taking care of William and your puppies. Take care, Julie

Yes, you have said it well as caregiving turns into careliving. Larry is now in his 6th year of recovery and like you, I assist him with most everything. He had an ischemic stroke, left side affected and cannot use his left arm or hand. He has had some big health issues lately, which I blogged about. But I went through stroke rehab, stroke therapies, doctor appointments and tests. It just became routine. I do believe getting help in the home has helped me from caregiver burnout. It is always good to have that support or back up from either friends, an agency or family. It is so important to take care of yourself as the stress and extra duties can be so difficult to handle alone. This board has helped me tremendously. Best wishes to you and your spouse, Julie

Yes, we are ready here Fred. We enjoy the games on cable TV. Too expensive to buy tickets plus the parking. One of Larry's favorite things - watching the St. Louis Cardinals play ball. Julie

Very nice Carol. We can all relate to your poem stating what many of us can be grateful for. Take care, Julie

Ruth good to hear from you. I'm glad you and William are doing well. If you need to get into chat, Sue or one of the others can help you. I have not been on for some time but had no trouble getting on last time with my new computer. Sorry about your job. Maybe this could be a turning point in your life and you can think about the move or just enjoying the dogs and doing things with William. Take care and let us know if you retire. Julie

I have a tree in front of our house that I wish our city would cut down. It is an oak and diseased, with the big "gall balls" bringing down branches and falling off the tree. If I am not careful, I step on one and can roll or fall. I called the city last year but they said they know it is diseased but it has a few more years. It is on common ground but we have to rake the leaves and pick up the mess. The city is suppose to trim them. The pear trees here are in full bloom and the red bud trees are coming out also. So pretty. You may need to plant another tree or have the city do it for you. Julie

Sarah, I hope things improve with your care giving issues. I know your son fills in but he cannot always be there. Have a good trip to ND and have a blessed reunion with your family. Julie

I have heard people spew out that word "new normal" and it has a different definition for every person. I think in our case it is just the word "acceptance" as to how things have changed for us. You have a good care giving attitude and have helped Bob in many ways. Best wishes to you both. Julie

Happy Anniversary to you and Bruce. We were always right behind you in Larry's 6th year. You can be proud of what Bruce does and even making you dinner. Tell Bruce "keep up the good work". And you, my friend, give yourself a hug from me. Julie