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Im scared


CagedBird

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I woke up at 3am. I remember people talking to me and me being in a hospital so I thought I just woke up from a dream but I also remember waking up scared because something was pushing my body. I felt really off balanced but my stomach hurted really bad so i walked to the bathroom. nothing happened so I laid back down and although I was still scared eventually I fell back asleep. I woke up again around 9am. I started looking at tv when I started to feel really hot and my heart started beating really fast. I felt dizzy and nauseous. I knew I could not yell for my dad so I sat up to go get him but something pushed me back down on the bed and my head hit the pillow. I called my dad from my cell phone and he came in here. I felt normal again.

 

Unfortunately, I have been having twitches of dizziness all day. They feel just like they're about to turn into a seizure but I will just get a flash then it goes away. Ever since I woke up this morning, my pinky finger hurts, I scratched my leg, and my tongue is sore from where I must have bit it. Seizures? Panic attacks? Demons? Seems like everyone has a theory but no one has any answers. I have an appointment with Duke neurology next week. I hope they have some answers and treatment for me. I've already quit my job, gave up my apartment, and moved back home. This condition has me scared to drive or to go anywhere but worst of all Im scared to lay in my own bed, scared to rest, scared to sleep, scared to read a book. These passive activities seem to trigger the condition. Woe is me. Thanks for all your support.

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here is a thought for your appt..... print out all your blogging entries -- this will help give the doc a idea of what has been going on and for how long.... when it started etc. things you have tried, observed and have felt...... this diary could be very valuable to finding the culprit ...

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Katrina, I hope you find answers soon, it all sounds very scary. You need answers from your neurologist as this sounds like fits or small seizures to me. Do you have some quiet music you can put on? That might alter your state of mind and relax you more.

 

Hope our praying for you helps.

 

Sue.

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How scary! Maybe an intercom to communicate with your dad when you need help? Nancy's idea was right on...list this stuff for the doctor to read. You might forget part or all of it by then or it might not seem as important. I hope you find answers. :)

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Honey,

I lived with panic attacks for years before my stroke. The way I tried to manage them was to rationalize that as long as I wasn't driving, What was the worst that could happen to me? I'd black out? I actually learned meditation after a while so I knew I didn't need to live in fear of them because I knew how to calm myself down. ~ Post stroke I don't get anxiety attacks. I still find mediation extremely calming, however, post stroke found it very difficult to do. Things like neurosensitivity and spasticity keep you in much too of a state of heightened awareness.

I also know before I seize I fel like I'm having one of those dreams where you're trying to run away from something and your legs won't work, or yell and nothing comes out.

Not much you can do about it either way for now and worrying won't make it stop or fix it. The doctor will have the answer and tend to it. You are with your dad so you are safe.

We love you so be sure to let us know how you make out.

 

Love,

Maria

xoxoxo

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Katrina, great idea from Nancy, so you do't forget anything to tell the doctor. Hope everything goes well with your appointment.

You are in my prayers.

 

Yvonne

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