Been a while!
Hi everybody! It has been quite a while since my last blog so I don't even know where to start. Let's see I guess I will start with Mike. Well he is batteling the dizziness and nausea again. Doctor said a month ago he had fluid build up behind the eardrum and gave him a shot to clear it up. Hasn't helped at all. Now he says the fluid is gone and it is just due to the stroke. How can that be? He hasn't been dizzy for almost 6 months now and then all of a sudden he is. I just don't think it is from the stroke. I don't know though maybe it is. He is starting to get really ill and so miserable! I feel so sorry for him sometimes. The doctor put him on an antidepressant and told him it was for dizziness. Guess he thought he might be having some anxiety that was causing it. Some days he takes it and he feels really good, other days he takes it and is just blah. Oh well as Nancy says "It is what it is". Could the antidepressant cause him to be depressed? Well as most of you know my Mom passed away in Feb. Well now my Dad is on his last days and I am sitting here at the hospice house with him tonight just watching him lay there and breath. He is so weak he can barely open his eyes and when he does it is only for a few moments and then closes them again. He has asked for Mom more times than I can remember and my sisters said last night he called out loud for her. I know the time is very near and not to sound cold hearted but I will be thankful when it is over. None of us want to suffer in our last days. I played some of his favorite music for him earlier tonight and I think he smiled! I hope I brought just a little joy to him today. It has been a rough few years for me. First my brother passed in 2011, Mike stroked in 2012, my niece passed in 2013 now losing my mom and dad in 2014. I guess that's what happens as we get older, loved ones die and we are left to ponder the whys of it all! At 50 I feel like I have lived 100 years already. Enough with the woah is me stuff! I should be thankful for my blessings instead of moaning about all the bad things. Somewhere I think I got off track in my thoughts so I hope you can follow and understand my ramblings and I didn't bore you too bad. Think I am gonna lay back pull a blanket over my head and steal a nap while dad is asleep. Good night all. Hope you have a blessed Sunday!
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