I dont really know what to say. just decided to blog. Ever since the day I opened the door knob, I have been doing it every morning I go to get my wash cloth to wash my face and sometimes in the evening to get my towel for the shower. I showed my dad and he was proud of me. I also have continued to do my exercises that stretch my arm. Still working on keeping the splint on the entire night without taking it off in my sleep. Im glad it doesn't hurt though. I used to could never fall asleep with it on because it hurted so bad to stretch my fingers and wrist but now I hardly notice its there. I guess the discomfort doesnt kick in until after I've been sleep and its been on for a few hours.

I missed my last appointment with my therapist because I didnt have a ride and my car insurance company had just informed me that they took full coverage off of my policy since I wasnt an experienced driver yet (which I am now) so I didnt want to take the chance that day driving until I got the insurance straightened out. Im kind of glad though. I know it sounds crazy but I have actually had more success battling the attacks using christian techniques than I did using the techniques I read in the books I checked out from the library. All the deep breathing and things like that never seemed to work. but now telling myself scriptures, rebuking satan's attacks over my mind, and thanking God that the attack is going away soon really helps me. In my last entry I said I'd had 6 attacks the week before and they were big and scary (including 1 with my mom, 1 with my dad, and 1 with my friend) but last week I think I only had like 2 or 3 attacks that didnt last longer than a few seconds because I really had faith and confidence that it could not take my joy and it was ending soon instead of fear that it was getting worse and getting upset that it was happening again.

I've been doing a lot of church things lately. I joined the singles ministry and a women's ministry at church so I've gone out with them to social events on weekends. I really am grateful that I have friends and I live close to everyone and I get invited to outings that I enjoy. I feel like depressed caged bird sometimes during the weekdays when I just sit here all day watching movies while everyone is at work so it definitely helps to "get out my cage" and socialize on weekends.