i have been EXTREMELY angry at my husband since thursday. he has always done things to make me mad, but this one takes the cake. it makes me SO mad, i don't even want to write what he did. i haven't spoken to him since and spend most of my time at my office. it would be different if he would ever apologize, but he won't. he thinks i'll get over it like i always have, and i am NOT going to "get over it" this time!!!!!

i didn't marry him ten years ago only to go through another divorce, but at this point i see no alternative. i have been mad at him continually since NINETEEN HUNDRED AND NINETY FIVE!!!!! i know no one is perfect, but i just expect him to be an AVERAGE annoying husband. this man is in the running to get the "WORST HUSBAND OF THE YEAR" award. i am completely sick of it. i am tired of being angry. it's exhausting.

i think that his behaviour during and after this stroke i had has opened my eyes. i hate to admit it to myself, but it's time. he does not really love me. he is incapable of truly caring about anyone but himself. he is narcissistic, no doubt about it. only giving to others when it can benefit his own needs. no empathy, no remorse, no tenderness. sometimes i don't think the man has a soul.

he is a great con artist making people THINK he is a good person. he even had me fooled for a year or two. but anyone who truly knows him, including his family and daughter, know this to be true. i don't know what made him be this way, but i doubt it will change. i'm not going to do anything hasty. i am going to take my time so it will be less stressful to me. but i am going to get away from this situation before it drains the last ounce of life out of me.

the end