So, the time has come. Where bosses were understanding, they are losing that attitude. They are compleining about my accuracy, the time it takes me to complete tasks, the amount of time I am out vs in the office now. I can see what is happening. I still have short-term memory issues. I have language issues. I have mobility issues. I've been back in the office about 2 months. I'm not "getting better" as fast as they want me to. Well, stroke recovery is something that takes time, a lot of time.

I've been working on filling out my disability claim. Maybe it is for the best. I can't work under pressure any more. I get headaches and I stop being able to process written language. For someone who spends much of their time coding or doing R&D, that is not good.

I talked to my mother. She told me to expect to be denied disability the first time through. Everyone is as a matter of course. Once that happens, I have a disability lawyer who is just waiting to help get me approved the second time through.

Maybe she and my sister are right. Maybe it is time to slow down, quit the "rat race" and take things easy. I'll bide my time here, basically getting paid to do not a whole lot of anything, for as long as I need to, then let it all go.

I've already left a legacy here at the office. I've been part of getting a lot of things to happen for the employees, and there are several employees who have their positions because of employee referrals by me.

If I leave, it won't be defeated. I will be able to leave on my terms.