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My 2nd Anniversary

Today marks 2 years as a stroke victim. It's been quite a trip! I still think of myself as before and after. In many ways I feel I'm a better person since...more patient, understanding, enjoying simple pleasures, yet I miss the more active person I was. I'm still adjusting to the new me. One day at a time. Strokenet definitely helped me throughout. I log on very little now but I'm forever greatful.

Linda 315

Linda 315

Giving Thanks

I haven't made an entry in a long time. I am now 15 months post stroke and continue to get stronger. My left side is still asleep and heavy but it's becoming normal for me...I'm accepting it (some days better than other days).   I check into strokenet often and was more active than I am now but this site is always with me.   Thanksgiving is almost here and I just want to thank all at Strokenet for the site, information, sharing of experiences and emotions. To me we are all family and I be

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My One Year Mark

Tomorrow is my first anniversary. Wow! What a year it's been. I don't know where to begin. My emotions are so diverse yet I feel gratitude above all.   I'm 54 and having a stroke was not my first battle...it was my first physical battle. I've come a long way and intend to keep improving. I am a fighter but I know I could not do this alone.   I am so very lucky to have a wonderful, supportive husband. We've been through many tests and our love keeps growing. He is my safety net as he pu

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California Here I Come

On Tuesday my husband and I are flying out to San Frasisco. We'll stay there for 3 days and then we're renting a car and driving down the coast to San Diego where he has a business conference. We'll be doing sights along the way. I'm very excited but also very anxious. I want to be able to keep up the pace and not poop out. This is also the first time I'll be seeing many people since my stroke.   I haven't been in California since a teen tour when I was 16. That's a long time ago. I think I

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Being a Mom

My greatest joy comes from being a mom. I didn't always feel like this. When my daughter entered this world, 30 years ago, she terrified me. She didn't do anything that Dr. Spock said she should do and I was convinced she hated me and I was an awful mother. Once she was able to walk and talk we became great buddies. We're so very different, therefore she opened me to her world and caused me to learn and grow in areas outside of myself.   My son is now 22 and was the perfect infant. Did every

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FEELING BLUE

For the past few days I've been feeling down. I'm tired of having half my body asleep and heavy. It's really wearing me down and I wonder how long I can keep this up. I know I have no choice but I'm just soooooo tired of it. Just had to unload.

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Another Birthday

Today's my birthday. It's also my father's birthday so it was always a very big deal. I'm 54 and dad is 83, in wonderful health. It's my first birthday since my stroke. I was feeling a little down this morning but pushed myself to make it a good day. On my side is the weather, cold but sunny, and a wonderful friend who took me to lunch and made me laugh. My husband called me throughout the day as well as my daughter. I haven't heard from my son (21 in college) but I'm not surprised and it's o

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100 THINGS THAT DEFINE ME

This is a little scary but here goes...   1. I'm a Pisces   2. I'm married to my best friend who happens also to be a great LOVER! Very lucky me!!!   3 I have 2 children   4. I tell my daughter to lighten up...   5. I tell my son to get more serious...   6. I have a Peke-a-Poo.   7. I love him like a child...He brings only joy and licks...   8. I have a small group of wonderful friends.   9. My oldest friend is from the 3rd grade.   10. My first job was workin

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It's in the Cards

Every Friday night, for the past 5 years, we would play cards, a game called May I, with our closest friends. The guys would smoke their cigars, Wendy and I would have our vodka or wine and we would laugh alot. Since my stroke, we're still playing, even though I'm slower and someone has to shuffle for me. The guys did give up their cigars but we're still drinking and it's really a wonderful night. I'm so thankful for the wonderful people around me.

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A SNOWY DAY

It snowed last night and dropped about 7 inches. It does look so beautiful. I used to love shoveling. It would be a good work out and I always treated myself to a big hot chocolate afterwards. Now I'm hoping someone will ring my bell to shovel for me. This is the part I find so painful...not being able to do things how and when I want to.

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6 Month Anniversary

It's 6 months of living my new way of life. On one side I'm doing very well and so thankful to be able to, and on the other I'm mad as HELL!!! It's little things...not being able to hold my niece's baby...unable to open jars...taking forever to blow dry my hair...pretending I can do everything...I think that's the biggest...PRETENDING! It's so exhausting. I guess I'm still in denial and I don't think I'll ever be able to accept this. There's also the constant, tiny voice saying...will it happen

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Life Goes On...

Every morning I wake up hoping my stroke was just a very bad dream, then the realization sets in...I'm different. From the outside I look the same, no one could tell, which I guess I'm grateful for, but the expectations remain the same. I'm also responsible for that because I want everyone to think I'm FINE...I can do pretty much everything except slower and I have to pace myself because I get exhausted. I'm physically exhausted and emotionally exhausted trying to keep up with the pace and facad

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Good to be Home

Well, I survived Florida. It was wonderful to see the parents but painful to witness the aging. Here, I was anxious about not being able to take them and do for them, and they have definitely slowed down themselves. Getting away from one's routine is good for the soul. I had time to examine really what's going on with me and I've come to the conclusion, that I still have not accepted having a stroke. Everyday I'm *beep* that my left side is weak and feeling weird. I'm expecting to wake up a

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Fear of Florida

For the past 12 years, every winter my family would go to Florida to visit the parents and in-laws. As the years have progressed, our visits have become more important. Our parents are getting older and look so forward to our arrival. We go places they wouldn't go to and take care of things they have difficulty with. This year I'm different. I don't look different but my left side is numb and weak and I tire. I don't want them to worry and I also want to continue to do what I've always done

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January 2, 2005

Today was a wonderful day. I went into the city with my best friend to take my daughter for brunch for her 30th birthday. Everything was perfect...the day, the restaurant, the food, the people around us and I was able to enjoy every moment.  

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The New Year

Well I made it through my first New Year as a stroke victim. I'm still having a difficult time accepting that for no known reason a blood vessel collapsed in my brain causing my whole left side from head to toe to feel like it's sleeping and so heavy. From the outside no one would know there's anything wrong which in a way makes it even more difficult. I try to keep up with the pace but it becomes exhausting. I can't believe this is to be my daily battle. I know it could be so much worse but I d

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