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Entries in this blog

It's been awhile, Have some great news

Hi All, Its been sometime since I blogged, I love what you have done with the place. I have been taking the pain meds and they make me very tired by night-time. 6 days left and school is out and I can finally rest. I will also be able to get back to the site. Surgery is set for June 8th, can't wait it better work. I have some really great news. Rod has been doing some pretty amazing stuff. He finally started trying to write and it has been going well. He asked last week if I would take him t

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Pity Party for one

I haven't been blog for awhile, I am in so much pain at night I have been going to bed early. I am trying to keep work till the surgery, I really don't have a choice we need the income and the health insurance. Luckily I have summers off. Today was not one of my better days, I finally get a call for a job closer to home and I have to pass because of the back surgery. I tried talking to Rod about it, discuss the choices and I was talking to myself. We use to talk so much about so many things and

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Flower Show in Buffalo

I had a great trip with my students to set up for the Buffalo flower show. I just set up a new album with some pictures of the flowers and work my students did. Even with my back hurting I enjoyed the day. Rod almost got his computer wireless, hopefully by Thursday then I will get him back on the site. His computer is so slow he gets fustrated. We had a long talk about the driving again. I want him to wait a little while longer. His forgetfulness has me worried. I have gotten the information for

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Spring is in the air

I got to spend most of the weekend at a regional flower show. I was recruiting students for our progam. I teach landscape contruction and design. The flowers were so beautiful and really gave you the itch for spring. Plant people are really great, they are like caregivers they always have a smile and want to talk. This is the first time in a year I have done this and I had so much fun and met so many good people. I also realized I needed to get back into my field and do some speaking events and

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Work in Progress

Most nights I just come here and read the blogs. They lift me up when I am down, and make me realize that things are really pretty good. I started reading tonight and it was like listen to my daughter the other night. She made the comment that I always use to see the upside to everything my glass was half full. That I am only focusing on the bad lately. Is this a caregiver thing? Then I read Alpine and Asha's blog and I heard the same thing my daughter was saying. I want to get to that point whe

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Back Surgery

We finally got my results and I have to have back surgery (fusion) in May. It's a defect I was born with. I am just so lucky I got all the best genes (LOL). Rod came with me and even asked questions of the doctor. It's going to be difficult but, after the last two days I think we will be OK. When we got back to the car after the appt Rod insisted on taking his scooter apart and putting it in the back of the car, he did pretty well. He had a little trouble with taking the two main pieces apart. W

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Rod was in a chat

Well I finally got Rod on the board and got him in a chat with Jean and Sharnett. Thankyou both for talking to him. He was really happy he tried it. He can get over that people are talking on line. This from a man who use to build machines with computers in them. I think he is finally going to start reaching out. Today is a really good day. When he is online you will see RodD, he still learning so if he doesn't answer he maybe be confused how to respond. I will keep working with him on that. :th

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Our Valentines Day

I have been reading all the blogs about love, how it changes, valentines day, and people mistaking us for their daughters instead of their wives. Today is our 18th wedding anniversary and I was thinking of all the things we cannot do or we do not have in our lives right now and it was sort of sad. I brought Rod home a rose and he had a card waiting for me. He had tried to write something special like he use to do all the time before his stroke. He had the biggest smile because he had tried and t

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Getting out stroke symptoms messages

I was told when Rod had his stroke that more people die from stroke than heart attacks, yet more is said about the warning signs of heart attacks than strokes. After Rod's stroke I was given a list of signs, he had almost everyone, and he had been seeing his doctor to complain. She had over 10 posters on heart attack symptoms and not one for stroke. I think many GP don't even recognize stroke symptoms. There needs to be some way to make the public more aware of stroke and it's symptoms. It's too

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Finishing sentences

I just realized today that Rod and I will be celebrating our 18th anniversary on Feb 13. We married on the same day as our first date which was a friday the 13th (we figured if we survived the day then it was lucky for us). It was a second marriage for both of us each with our own children. They say second marriages are the hardest. I say it has been the best even with the stroke. We have been through a lot of stuff but, our relationship just always got stronger. I use to be the one always in a

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Depending on others

I have to go and have a test on my back on thursday after which I have to lay flat for a day and a half(Mylogram). I was so worried about what I was going to do to feed Rod or help him if he needed it. He can do a lot of things but using the stove is not one. Then I remembered I said I was going to reach out from now on and ask for help when I needed it. Reaching out is so hard for me, I do have that super women attitude sometimes, or maybe I just don't need to be let down. Well, I reached out a

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Getting on with life

Today was a good day, I am starting to have a good time at work and enjoying our life even with the changes the stroke has brought us. I hurt my back just before thanksgiving and found out on Monday it going to be a continual problem. I am just finally beginning to realize life is tough for everyone not just us, and that it could be worse! We are going to start living the life we have now and the heck with thinking about what we had. What we still have is each other. We need to find new things t

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Lake effect snow

Well winter finally found us, darn. This Lake effect snow thing is for the birds. We are starting our third year here and I still can't figure out why anyone in their right mind would live here if they didn't have too. When I was first hired for the job I asked about they snow, I was told we get around 6" and it stays that way the rest of winter. Yeah! that because it usually snows on a daily basis. The year we moved here it snowed everyday until the end of April. At least this year has been my

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Surprises

:happydance: I haven't posted in awhile but something happened that is so wonderful and I figure I need to talk about the good as well as the bad. Last night Rod made a comment that he was worried he had forgotten so much and that he could remember things that happened when the kids were little. He started talking about his stroke for the first time and told me what it had felt like and what he remembers of all that he went through. 45 mins. had past I just let him go on and on, I couldn't belie

Keepongoing

Keepongoing

Christmas blues New Year smiles

Christmas use to be my favorite holiday, over the years I have lost that feeling. I think it comes from all the expectations I have of what it should have been. I am trying so hard to stay upbeat this year but, it is not easy. I fell down a few weeks ago and hurt my back. Now they say I have degenerative joint diease. Next Friday Rod goes in for surgery on his kidney stones. We both have had colds so we decided not to go to Massachusetts for Christmas. I had Rod call his family to tell them we w

Guest

Guest

One step at a time

We go out to eat all the time to the same place. Most of the waitresses always ask me what my husband wants, I think they worry about making him uncomfortable. He still has problems with his speech. I know it makes him feel bad. He would love it if he could talk clear or quicker. Couple of days ago we had a different waitress she was wonderful. She treated him like he did not have any problems, asked what he want and wait each time for an answer. She never checked with me once. Because of her pa

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Guest

New and Brighter day

There's something about this time of year that we always seem to have one of us spending time in the hospital. Rod has some kidney stones that need to be removed, there too big to past on there own. The only good thing about all of this is he has no pain. Even when he had heart surgery, no pain, no need for pain meds. The Drs. figure the stroke did this. So New Years we are spending at home, no dancing for him. (He didn't dance much before the stroke either) Rod did something to day that really

Guest

Guest

Whats wrong with people

This past week has been really tough, I am not sure if I have been putting my emotions on hold for the last two years. It's been a real roller coaster week, Floods of emotions just keep coming out. I am not sure if the holidays are bring it on. After moving all the way out here for my new job, they maybe closing my department. Yet just a week ago I refused another job at the prompting of a colleague. SO the job search begins, I know I have at least a year which will give me some time to look. We

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Monday again

Well the day started out not to good. For the first time in three years I over slept. I was late for work and my students left after 10 mins. Freshman, what a difference a year will make.It did give me sometime to get my bearings except going to work without coffee, what was I thinking! I spent a great part of the day with the students setting up for their Christmas tree sale. Two more weeks till Christmas break and more time to relax. We got a call from Rod's Dr. he is having problems with his

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Guest

Working towards a new year

We were not able to be with family this year for Thanksgiving which was disappointing. I was in the process of interviewing for a new job in another state. Being away from family and not knowing anyone here has been tough. If your not a local most people will not bother with you. It's been even tougher for my husband Rod. We went to my Thanksgiving party at work last Sunday and none of my co-worker even talked to him. It was sad. In the last couple of days I have talked to a couple of people who

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Taking one day at a time

I just found this board a few weeks ago and I have been doing so much reading. After 2.5 years of living with a stroke survivor I am finding answers to things that many are going through. It has been such a help. I came to this board right after my husband was hospitalized with seizures. I was so angry at the world and I had gotten so depressed. I already take medication for depression. The disappointment I was feeling was not just for Rod my husband but, now I think I had never really grieved t

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