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1ST TIME BLOGGER

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LONELY AND QUIET HERE

ITS BEEN 4 WEEKS SINCE MY SON LEFT FOR COLLEGE AND ITS SO LONELY AND QUITE HERE.ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT. EVEN MY DOG LOOKS FOR HIM TOO. I NOTICE MY WORK LOAD IS MUCH LESS FOR ME. I WASH 2 LOADS OF CLOTHES A WEEK, I DON T COOK MUCH AND THE HOUSE IS MUCH!!! EASIER TO KEEP CLEAN.I MISS BLABBING WITH HIM EVERY NIGHT.WHEN I CALL HIM EVERY NIGHT, HE TELLS ME HES FINE, SOME HOMESICK BUT SCHOOL IS KEEPING HIM BUSY. HE SAID HE JOINED A VOLUNTEER CLUB TO HELP AND UNDERSTAND DISABLED PEOPLE MORE. HIM AND THE O

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

BEING TESTED, AGAIN

OUR SON LEFT YESTERDAY TO GET HIS DEGREE AT CENTRAL UNIVERSITY, ABOUT 2 HOURS AWAY.IM HAPPY FOR HIM,I HUGGED, KISSED HIM, TOLD HIM I LOVE HIM AND CRIED SOME CAUSE ILL MISS HIM AND HIS HELPING ME. I CRIED AFTER HE LEFT, FOR ME SINCE ILL BE HOME ALONE!NOW DONT GET ME WRONG, IM GLAD HES GETTING HIS DEGREE , STARING HIS OWN LIFE BUT HERE I SIT HOME ALONE, AGAIN! I WAS TESTED FOR MY STROKE, MY EMOTIONS, WHAT I CAN DO AND WHAT I CANNOT DO.MY DISABILITIES AND HOW THEY CHANGED MY LIFE. I LOST FRIENDS. I

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

AUGUST ALREADY

IT SEEMED LIKE THE FLOWERS WERE JUST BLOOMING AND I WAS LOOKING FORWARDS FOR SUMMER AND ITS 1/2 WAY GONE! GEEZ!! TIME DOES FLY WHEN YOUR KEEPING BUSY.EVEN THOUGH MY STROKE IS OVER 3 YEARS OLD, IM STILL LEARNING THINGS ..NEW AND I CAN T DO THIS ANY MORE TO KEEP MYSELF OCCUPIED. FIRST..IM STILL WORKING MY 2 DAYS A WEEK. I TAKE A SMART BUS TO WORK NOW AND IT ONLY 1.00. WERE MOVING THE OFFICE TO A NEW LOCATION IN 3 WEEKS, 1 MILE AWAY.IM NERVOUS ABOUT MOVING BUT ILL DO OK. SECOND..MY HUSBAND AND I C

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

STROKE CLUB

LAST WEEK I JOINED A STROKE CLUB BY MY HOUSE. I FELT I NEEDED MUCH SUPPORT AFTER MY STROKE AND I NEEDED TO RELY ON ME MUCH MORE FOR MY LIFE THEN RELYING ON OTHER PEOPLE TO DO THINGS FOR ME.I GET TIRED OF PEOPLE SAYING WELL GO OUT TO A MOVIE OR WE CAN SHOP ON THIS DAY AND YOU CALL THE DAY BEFORE TO CONFIRM IT AND THEY FORGOT AND HAVE OTHER PLANS.OR YOU NEED TO GO SOME WHERE BUT YOUR PUT ON THE BACK BURNER TIL THEY HAVE TIME.MAYBE LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW. IS EVERYONE SO BUSY? WHEN SOMEONE NEEDED

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

stress on marriage

last week we rented a car and drove from Michigan to Kansas to see our property. it was fun but all i did was eat,sit while my husband drove and slept. we were there an back in 6 days.we had some rain going there, but fortunately we missed all the big storms and tornadoes. . it was fun but tiring. but the next day, reality hit home again. the friends were calling and coming by, the beer started and i was left sitting in the house again, by myself! i know ive let this happen thru out our marriag

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

THE GOLDEN GIRLS

I LOVE TO WATCH ON TV..THE GOLDEN GIRLS. THEIR FUNNY AND I LAUGH! MY HUSBAND OR SON WILL SAY...OH KNOW, SHES WATCHING THEM AGAIN. OR YOU SEEN THOSE BEFORE. HOW CAN YOU WATCH THEM AGAIN!I THINK HOW CAN I BUT THEN I SMILE AND SAY ITS FUNNY. I NEED THE LAUGHTER. I WOULD WATCH ANY COMEDY SHOW ON TV, JUST TO LAUGH.WHEN I HAD THE STROKE, I WAS BUSY TRYING TO GET BETTER. I HAD DIFFERENT EMOTIONS AND ONE I FOUND THAT WAS SUPER HARD ON ME BESIDE THE STROKE WAS THAT PEOPLE WERE TREATING ME DIFFERENT! THE

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

LIFE CHANGES

ITS BEEN ALMOST 1 YEAR SINCE I VE BLOGGED. ITS BEEN 3 YEARS SINCE MY STROKE AND HAVE AND WILL HAVE MANY CHANGES IN MY LIFE. ME, IM ABOUT THE SAME. I SEE SLOW, MILD IMPROVEMENTS WITH MY BODY. IM STILL LEARNING WHAT I CAN AND CANNOT DO YET AND IM STILL LEARNING ABOUT ACCEPTING MY STROKE. ITS STILL VERY HARD TO ACCEPT BUT THAT WILL NOT STOP ME FROM GETTING MORE STRENGTH, CONFIDANT AND TO KEEP ON GOING

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

EMOTIONAL TODAY

TODAY I FEEL VERY EMOTIONAL. I WISH I COULD GO AWAY AND NEVER COME BACK. I KNOW ITS PART OF HAVING A STROKE BUT MAYBE NOT! THIS AFTERNOON, I ASKED MY SON TO CUT A SLICE OF ONION AND DICE IT SO I COULD MAKE PIGGIES IN A BLANKET AND HE ..ROLLED HIS EYES AND SAID TSK. I GOT SO MAD I THREW THE ONION AT A CAN AND HE THEN THREW THE ONION ON THE FLOOR AND WENT TO HIS BEDROOM AND SLAMMED THE DOOR! I JUST WANT TO CRY, GET ANGRY, JUST..GO. AAY. I HATE THIS STROKE . IT PREVENTS ME FROM DOING SOOOO MUCH I T

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

FAITH HEALING

THURSDAY I HEARD AND SAW A DR ON THE NEWS, WHO DOES FAITH HEALING WITH HIS HANDS. A WOMEN WHO WAS BLIND, CAN NOW SEE.HE PUT HIS HANDS OVER HER EYES. A WOMEN WITH BACK PAIN FOR 7 YR, NOW HAS NO PAIN. HE PUT HIS HANDS ON HER BACK. I KEPT THINKING OF HIM.COULD HE HELP ME. I ACCEPT THE STROKE PART FOR I THINK I DO OK. BUT THE BOUNCING OF MY EYES. THE LOSING OF MY BALANCE AND THE SHAKING OF MY HEAD MAKES MENOT FEEL GOOD, DRIVES ME CRAZY AND I HATE IT.I USUALLY NEVER COMPLAIN ABOUT THIS CAUSE REALLY

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

FRIENDS AND FAMILY

I WENT TO THE STRORE THE OTHER DAY AND JUST BOUGHT ALOT OF FRIENDS, FAMILY AND THANK YOU CARDS TO SHOW MY APPRECIATION FOR ALL THEY VE DONE FOR ME AND ITS NICE GETTING A CARD IN THE MAIL . I ADDRESSED 3 FAMILY CARDS AND 10 CLOSE FRIEND CARDS AND THEN I RAN OUT. I COULD OF SENT CARDS TO MY NEIGHBORS, A FEW GIRLS I WORK WITH AND A FEW OTHER FRIENDS!I WAS SHOCKED. I THOUGHT I COULD MAIL A FEW BUT I STARTED WRITING, SENDING THIS CARD TO THAT PERSON, THIS CARD TO THIS PERSON AND BEFORE I KNEW, I RAN

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

WORK PARTY

TODAY AT WORK, WE HAD OUR XMAS PARTY.I WORK FOR ORTHOPEDIC AND BACK DRS SO WE HAD ABOUT 30 OF US CRAMMED IN OUR PHONE ROOM CELEBRATING!WE EACH BROUGHT A FOOD TO PASS. SO E WORKED SOME, STE, TALKED, LAUGHED, ATE SOME MORE. OPENED GIFTS AND THE DRS GAVE EACH OF US A GIFT OF MONEY IT WAS NICE AND FUN.ALL NITE I WORRIED THAT MY WALKER WON T SQUEEZE THRU THE HALLS WITH THE FOOD OR WHERE WILL I WORK,SO OF COURSE I DIDN T SLEEP AT ALL. BUT I WENT TO WORK , RODE THE ELEVATORS TO THE 3RD FLOOR, AND WHEN

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

FAITH

I READ A NEW MEMBERS INTRO AND SHE HAS SO MANY DEFICITS FROM HER STROKE BUT SHE STILL HAD FAITH IN GOD AND A POSITIVE HEAD AND I THINK, WHERES MINE. , FAITH , MY POSITIVE THINKING?I ALWAYS THOUGHT I WAS A POSITIVE THINKER AND YEA I QUESTIONED MY FAITH. BUT SINCE THE STROKE MY EMOTIONS ARE STILL ALL OVER THE PLACE. THE GRIEF, DEPRESSION, THE WHY ME S THE BARGAINING STILL! LIFE JUST ISN T FAIR. I TRIED READING THE BIBLE OR A BOOK OF PRAYERS BUT I LOSE INTEREST. I ALSO SAY MY PRAYERS EVERYN

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

TODAY WAS JUST A ME DAY

TODAY WAS JUST A ME DAY. I WENT THIS MORNING TO GET FRESH VEGGIES AT A STAND WITH MY HUBBY AND THEN I JUST VEGGED. MY HUBBY LAIED AROUND AND DIDNT BOTHER ME MUCH. MY SON CAME HOME AND PUTZED ON HIS COMPUTER SO I SAT AROUND AND FININHED1 BOOK AND BEGAN ANOTHER .IN BETWEEN READING I ENJOYED THE CLOUDS, TREES, BIRDS. I TALKED ON THE PHONE WITH FRIENDS AND WALKED MY DOG AND ME. I HAD A BUSY LAST FEW WEEKS. I WENT TO THE MOVIES 2X AND LUNCH WITH FRIENDS, HAD A CARD PARTY HERE FRI SO I CLEANED THE HO

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

wher did the summer go

the summer went by so fast fall will be here soon and im not yet ready to sit in the house this winter. i love spring cause i know summer is around the corner. the flowers bloom, tank tops, shorts are taken out and so are the chairs to sit on. i ve learned alot about the new me these past months.i thought a stroke would be the end for me.living, life, being and even breathing would be hard and sometimes i wish it would end!!!cause its very hrad..but I ve learned i nw know my limits, igo because

Pwilson18

Pwilson18

1st time blogger

this i my 1st time blogging so here goes..i had a brain stem stroke 1 27 08. i knew i was having a slow stroke but no dr would listen to me!i had a cyst to my pons and saw 5 dr til the last one saw me and said "you need to see my assoc who will do surg on you"i saw him 1 7 08 he scheduled surg 2 6 08. told me the pros and cons. by then i was still having a slow stroke. trouble walking buzzing to r ear. but me not being a pushr i thought i could wait.i dont understand why thr 1st dr whom i saw 11

Pwilson18

Pwilson18